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Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

Challenge #02133-E304: Forewarned is...

Humans love things that explode. "Ooh look! fireworks." -- Anon Guest

Things that Humans love that go bang in various ways: a list compiled by non-Humans.

  1. Popping candy. Effervescent crystals encapsulated in chocolate and sugar. When dissolving in saliva, produce a crackling sensation in the mouth and sinuses. Harmful to those with theobromine sensitivity, but otherwise mostly harmless. Offensensitivity rating: low.

  2. Popcorn. Grains originating from the American continents, heated until the water inside the grains bursts through their own hard casing. Consumed once the explosions cease. Harmless carbohydrate, easy for all species to consume. Preparation not recommended for class three or above Havenworlders. Offensensitivity rating: low to medium.

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Delayed!

Today was supposed to be air con installation day. Except I got a phone call in the middle of my shrink appointment. One of the dudes who works there broke his wrist.

Again.

This is the trainee/apprentice/younger fellow of the crew, so I presume it's something silly like missing a rung on the ladder or something, but the appointments have to be more spaced out until the lad gets some of his dexterity back and I completely get it.

My

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Challenge #02133-E304: Mislaid

"Did anyone see a tank?"

"What colour was it?" -- Anon Guest

"Bright flakking red," said Human Jen. Like all things that came from a Human's mouth, it was difficult to tell whether that was sarcasm, a joke, or the truth. This was something of a hindrance in a Military Replica Driving Range.

Thorkak took a deep, cleansing breath, and tried again, "For clarity of understanding, are you searching for a mechanical tank, a fish tank, or a garment tank?"

Human Jen

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Early start, better finish?

I'm getting some of my work done before I'm meant to be up and about this morning. It just makes sense.

I had a scrum day, yesterday. There wasn't a moment to stop until firkin midday when the temperature in my office was too much to bear. So I had to go do everything in the bedroom and it was pure luck that I got it all done.

I am trying to get all the Patreon stuff posted as soon as I

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Challenge #02132-E303: Occam's Solution

"We do this every month, and it always ends the same way!"

"But I'm telling you it shouldn't! We change every variable every time."

"But never the most important variable -- YOU!" -- Anon Guest

The wizard Narbic Parvin Charm boggled at the heroes. "So I just have to sit and wait like a bump on a log while you do all the complicated things to open the unopenable door?"

"That's looking like the shape of it," said the leader of the

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Come on, air con!

It's getting stifling in my office. The air conditioning can't come soon enough, in my mind.

It's the 5th. I have a shrink visit tomorrow, and come Wednesday, the people come to install the air con at firkin last.

Busy half of this week, but worth it in the long run because I will no longer have time limits to work on stuff in the office.

I should be working faster but... I'm extra distracted today. This is what happens to me

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Challenge #02131-E302: Strangers in a Very Strange Land

planetary survey on new world gets progressively jaded as they meet real mythical animals -- Anon Guest

Welcome to Mythos. Here, there be dragons. For real, actual dragons. They don't breathe fire, but they do have an acidic spray from their own digestive tract that's almost as bad. Their original gengineers started with the largest Terran lizard - the komodo - and worked at it from there. They're sluggish and make nests out of shiny objects to attract their mates. Beyond that,

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That went... awful.

Here's how it went:

  1. Write Instant story
  2. Do the advertising for same
  3. Go out to Bunnings and find a door
  4. Wrestle door into tiny car
  5. Get door to destination
  6. Door too small >:(

Good thing I neglected to throw away the receipt and we can firkin sort out things today.

This time, we're measuring the doorway, taking those stats with us, and finding a door with a window in it for that.

Beloved and I.

Because my car is firkin tiny and theirs

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Challenge #02130-E301: Let the Punishment Fit

"You do realise that the more you complain, call me rude names, and try to bully me into backing down, the more I'm going to look at this and ticket you for the faults, right?"

"And? I can pay as many tickets as you like, and before you make it back to your office!" -- Anon Guest

Officer Pam stared at the young man in the driver's seat. He was rich, you could tell by the car alone, but he had decided

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Here's the PLN:

One: I write this blog.

Two: I write today's Instant

Three: I write today's TAZ prompt instant fanfic

Cee: I go out and at minimum look at doors.

Six: I faff around for the rest of today.

There's plenty to do in part six of my cunning plan. Especially since I discovered a Japanese horror master from Tumblr playing Minecraft. I've seen one episode so far and it is unbelievably cute.

...the things you find out about via Tumblr.

Ahem.

In order

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Challenge #02129-E300: Megalomaniacs Are Hard to Shop For

"I shall bring you the heart of your greatest enemy!"

"What, all of year 10 English class? Messy." -- Anon Guest

"Wait. What? A high school English class is your greatest enemy?"

"Sit down and I'll tell you a tale," said Miss Evans, dedicated megalomaniac. "A tale most horrifying. A tale about the biggest group of irreverent, foul-mouthed, foul-minded punsters that have ever breathed."

Loqui was already feeling trepidatious. "Are you sure you have to? I'm a smart enough minion to get

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It's Friday!

There was a blackout, last night, so I got forcibly booted from my Delta Rune game. The good news from this is that can now exercise self control and not play games until my actual work is done.

Work that will doubtless be interrupted because Mayhem has a short day, today. Allegedly. We'll see.

I'm determined to focus, today.

So of course I'm going on a wiki walk through youtube because that's how I get in the zone.

Honest.

Besides, I have

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Challenge #02128-E299: Pick Up Your Skirts and Walk Away

"Have fun with your crisis, I'm going to live among the goats." -- OohLookShiny

Leth had told them. She'd told them often. She'd told them so much that they mocked her for saying it, but she said it nonetheless.

"No good has ever come from making the rich richer and the poor poorer," she had said. Or, "In order for an economy to flourish, you have to give money to people who will spend it."

They didn't listen. They didn't listen because

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Closer and Closer

November the first. Excluding today, that's six more days until the air con is installed.

Two more days (hopefully) until we have a door. If Beloved is that busy, I'm going to make a pilgrimage to Bunnings and firkin pick one that suits my aesthetics and damn the torpedoes.

It's going to be a rough six days, I can tell you. It's already hit 26 degrees in my office [80 degrees Fahrenheit] and it's not even eight in the morning, yet.

I

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Challenge #02127-E298: Cruel and Unusual

"I swear, if you press that button one more time, I will end you!" -- Anon Guest

In all the universe, no instrument of chaos has ever been more diabolical than the demo button. There's certainly a Hell where the damned is a stocker for aisled upon aisles of toys with demo buttons and hyperactive children who press them all as they go by.

Swarm Leader Yrtuq is certain of this as a small child presses a button on a brightly coloured

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