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Food

A 14-post collection

Challenge #03226-H317: Those Who Cut It

A new cooking school opens up that is considered one of the hardest schools of that type to be in. Where almost all classes were like competitions and the instructors were very strict. Even to become a student, one had to sign a waiver stating that they knew they could be dropped from the program at any moment if their scores in the classes got too low. Still, for those that graduated, they were considered among some of the best chefs in the galaxy! -- Lessons

Education in an interesting field in the Alliance. Some classrooms are designed with an atmosphere of peace and calm. Some teachers will do anything to get the lesson through to their students. Many build on a basework of understanding. One insists on perfection above all else.

In order to get in, one has to demonstrate a certain level of skill. One has to be able to tell one kind of knife from another, and have a working knowledge of food safety ingrained into one's soul. Even chicken soup has its high stakes. Those who arrive with hair nets and sneeze guards already donned have a mark in their favour.

Welcome to Ramsey's School of Culinary Excellence. In signing up, you recognise that you may not make it all the way through.

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Thursday, Day 0, Sleepless

Plague news: One new case, local transmission. Forty-nine total cases and forty-one are in hospital.

I've been awake since one-a-firkin-em this morning. I decided to use that time for a cooking experiment involving keto-friendly cheesecake. The cheesecake may be all fail, but it's the base I'm concerned about.

Basically, the base is runny nut butter thickened up with philly until it's mouldable like play-dough. If that works, then I can resume making cheesecake like normal.

What I failed at in the cheesecake

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Challenge #02969-H046: Don't Try to Understand it

Many birds on Earth are unaffected by capsacinoids in hot peppers (mammals are bothered, but mammal digestive systems destroy the seeds of the pepper plants, while avian digestive systems let the seeds pass through unharmed). May we see some avian sentients enjoying a nice ghost pepper and carolina reaper salad with a flavorful habenero sauce? Eye-watering fumes that could bother any nearby mammals are a bonus. -- Anon Guest

Pretty much everyone agrees that Humans are fairly weird. They're hairless apes possessing

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Challenge #02644-G087: One Person's Spice...

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RG9TMn1FJzc

Imagine Aliens need a Substance (like Salt, etc...) so Bad. -Mike666

"Limestone," said the Human with a raised eyebrow. "You guys need calcium carbonate? For reals?"

"The calcium carbonate is an essential mineral for us, yes. For reals."

The Human shrugged, "Well, we need sodium chloride in special amounts, so yeah. I'll try to see if we have the pure stuff for you." There was some significant rummaging about in the storage boxes. "Yeah. I

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Challenge #01876-E052: When You Put it That Way

National delicacy, the sort of stuff diplomats have to eat and appear to enjoy. Sheep's eyeballs and truly rotten fish come to mind. -- Anon Guest

"So what is this one?" And since this was the second time the Ambassador asked this question about the foodstuff before them, they didn't want to know what it was named. They wanted to know what it was made of.

"A goose's liver, after the animal has been force-fed to the point where said liver becomes

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International cuisine

Like all wisdom, some of the best food comes from outside of what we know. Beloved is determined to get this family away from western-themed bland monotony and ignorance of spices.

I miss Sweet Mustard Pickles, so Beloved has suggested a Korean version of Sauerkraut as a substitute. This version doesn't use sugar as a part of the pickling process, so I'm down with that.

We have lots of other options from all over the world. Some of which have ingredients that

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Challenge #01002-B270: Suck it, Scheherazade!

As far as I am aware, Australia is the only country in the world that eats every theoretically edible part of its national coat of arms (well, stars and crosses... bikkie form?) Roo (lean red meat, the animal is less harmful to the environment than cattle or sheep), Emu (tastes like chicken - well, kinda gamey chicken), and Wattle (seeds make a sweet flour), all eaten.

Although I guess for some countries that would be quite difficult, since they're cheating with having

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Training up the Baby Tongue

Okay, so I will admit to having a diet free of anything slightly burn-ish. The spiciest thing I cook is chilli con carne sans the chilli, and with a moderate amount of ginger instead.

Trouble is, everything everywhere is full of hotter spices than a splash of ginger.

And I often can’t stand it.

I need to train up to withstand the spicier stuff. And I need to do so in such a way as to not turn me off

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Another rant for another time #3: Overpopulation and the food crisis

I keep coming back to a webcomic I found where one of the characters says to a child, “There’s enough room in Texas for everyone in the whole world.” [Quote from memory, may not be verbatim]

It bothers me.

A lot.

Five seconds on Google reveals that the surface area of Texas is 261 914 square miles. That’s 6.78354146x10^11 square meters. About 67 835 414 600 if you want to take it long-form.

Given

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Sausage Soup

This is another one of those “scratch” recipes, in which you scratch together whatever you have going and put it in a pot.

You will need these tools:

1 big pot
1 handy heat source, like a cooktop
1 big spoon/ladle
1 knife or other means of chopping things 

You will need these ingredients:

sausages
water
sauce/flavour
herbs/spices
vegetables

The quantity of these is up to you. Optional extras include: soup mix, rice, potatoes/potato powder, and

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Fried Rice? So Nice!

At last! A recipe with more than just vague hints [seriously, we’re on the internet. You should know how to google stew recipes] and some actual directions.

You will need these tools:

1 large cooking container. Woks are great, but you don’t have to have them
1 means of cooking rice. Rice cookers are great, etc. etc.
1 or more handy heat source(s) like a cooktop
1 big sturdy spoon or spatula. Trust me, I mean it

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How to Stretch a Stew

There are as many recipes for stew as there are people who cook it. You might like a different kind of stew, but the core is the same:

* A lot of water
* Some kind of key protein [meat is traditional, but not necessary]
* Lots of vegetables
* Thickening

One of the key ideals of stew is that it can be stretched. You might portion yours up and freeze it straight after it’s cooked, but even then, you can stretch one portion

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Glop

This is a family recipe that can be traced back to MeMum [Hi!] who could not make tuna rissoles to save her life. After a very trying day, she just gave up and fried the entire mess and called it Tuna Glop.

I’ve changed things around a bit and created All Purpose Glop

You will need these tools:

1 mixing bowl
1 method of mixing
1 satisfyingly enormous frying pan
1 spatula or big spoon
1 handy heat source, like

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