Realm of the InterNutter

Merry Pripa's Day

To all those Primary Parentals who stay up late, wake up early, sit through sickness, and fret about the health of your little darlings... Grats.

You made it another year without throttling the little shits. Through angst, anguish, frustration, and fear. You made it. And some of them might actually be grateful for the effort.

I'm awake at Awful in the morning because of the so unfabulous combo of Sneezin' and Wheezin' Season plus low pressure system plus what feels like an incipient lurgi.

I've laid in supplies. I'm already living off my peculiar Shandy¹ and hoping this goes away. BUT when you can get ten bottles of diet fizzy water for four coins and still get change, you can bet I prepared in the extreme.

Today, we're headed off to the realms of Scenic Coominya by way of MeMum's to visit Capt S and have a celebratory meal. And I shall be valiantly attempting to stay off of the carbs. Because that sort of nonsense flares my Asthma, and in this time of year, it's the last thing I need.

And what y'all need now is story. Working on it RSN. The drawback of staying hydrated is constantly having to pee.

Shandy is usually a mix of a very small amount of alcohol, most often beer, plus lemonade [Sprite to the USians]. In my case, it's ginger beer plus lemonade plus a little bit of orange cordial. All diet so that I don't get any sugar. It's practically a Sham-dy ↩

Challenge #01951-E127: Posthumous Communication

Sandwiched between cardboard, or up-market leather they colour our lives, change the way we see the world, and of course they never age. Sherlock Holmes, Robin Hood, James Bond, Mr Darcy, Alice, Tom Sawyer. -- Anon Guest

"And then there's the curious incident of the dog in the night-time," Alpex read out loud. Like all new readers, the reading was painful and slow and almost monotonous. Ze stopped. "You do know this method of information sharing is the one least likely to

Sneezin', Wheezin' and CYCLONE Season

If there's anything worse than Sneezin' and Wheezin' Season, it's that plus fucking Low Pressure Systems making my face firkin hurt.

Today's episode of Fuck My Life began at half-past one in the morning and only abated because I finally got to the Ibuprofen plus Acetaminophen at 8ish. For Australians: Neurofen and Panadol. For the Americans: Nurofen and Tylenol.

I don't know any other nation's brands. Fill me in. I love to learn things.

So yeah. Spotty sleep. Painful face. An air

Challenge #01950-E126: What is Life and What is Real

They are quite real to us these lines coloured in sometimes, they've been with us since we first met them, and they seem 'real'. Comics, graphic novels, the funny pages. -- Knitnan

They were just shapes on a page. They should very clearly not be so impactful. They were the written word. They were pictorial representations of impossible things. They were imagination. They weren't real. And yet...

There he was. Hiding away from the world because these particular shapes on a page

Aah, Friday

A busier Friday than normal, but still... a relative day of rest for this nerd.

But it's also a cleaning day, so that means I'm working a lot more than normal. Usually, on a Friday, it's all relaxed despite having a thousand words to generate and a son to fetch from Banyo.

Today? I'm not so sure.

I have to make a phone call to talk to some people about getting Mayhem's phone fixed so that it's not a brick any more.

Challenge #01949-E125: Naked Without it

Pointy hats! There are the black, with a brim witch's model, the sparkly and starred wizard or wizzard's, the upside down ice cream cone with a floaty veil princess model and the plain paper cone with a big "D" for dunce. -- Knitnan

[AN: I don't think the D-cap existed outside of the Victorian Era]

You couldn't deny he was a wizard. The hat was a huge give-away. It made his full, wizarding height two feet taller and he changed it in

BBC SOP - FEFO

For those amongst the acronym challenged - BBC stands for the British Broadcasting Company. The public television since whenever.

SOP is Standard Operating Procedure. For instance, the standard operating procedure for politics is lie, cheat, and rack off with a golden parachute.

FEFO is new. It's something Beloved and I coined after absorbing a couple of episodes of a new thing from the BBC. It stands for this:

Four Episodes, Fuck Off

We've seen a lot of this with high-quality BBC products.

Challenge #01948-E124: Who's a Good Dog?

In the land of magic, Death frequently has problems with pets that absolutely refuse to stay dead. -- Anon Guest

In all of creation, there is nothing more loyal than a good dog. Though it was widely agreed that Kerby was one of the truly daft ones. He was a rescue dog, and had some kind of skin infection that made him look dead. Dan, who had picked him up with a shovel as part of his job, got the fright of

Well, Fuck

Okay. Here's the situation.

Cocoa contains carbs and I need to figure out the content of one button to keep my hot chocolates ketogenic
Mayhem has a conference with his guidance counsellor and I discuss his grades
I need new windshield wipers
Time is growing ever closer to the release of a better Apple Lappy for my first actual Earned Laptop
All my funds are tied up in other shit
Including Mayhem's traineeship [$2K]
And paying for my car rego [$600+]
My

Challenge #01947-E123: Loose End Tied

"Never, ever empty this person's pockets again!" referencing Harpo Marx, Sergeant Constantine Bothari, and any JOAT! -- Anon Guest

Okay, now I've fucked up, thought Taako, transmutation wizard extraordinaire. Crew-member of the Starblaster. Multi-dimensional traveller. One of the Seven Birds of Prophecy. Member of the B.O.B. Best chef in all of Faerûn. Oh, and main squeeze of the Grim fucking Reaper. This thought came, of course, at half-consciousness as the not-so-stupid guards dragged him to the throne room of the

My Face Hurts

There is a low pressure system somewhere. I can feel it in my left eye orbit. Starting at the bridge of the nose and graduating into the lower half of my eye socket. At least, thanks to some Panadol, the pain has ebbed from reaching my left temple and threatening to graduate into my teeth.

I paid $3K to have my nose fixed and therefore suffer this for potentially the rest of my life. Huzzah? The bonus, that I snore less harshly

Challenge #01946-E122: Change for the Better

Paper clips, rubber bands, and the ever reliable wire coat-hanger. -- Anon Guest

In accordance with Galactic Standards and Practices verses the JOAT Conglomerate, all Standard Screws will now feature a slot to accommodate the use of a 5 Sec Coin in lieu of any screwdriver.

Truly. This was a day of victory. Of course, the fine print under the announcement reassured business owners that secure spaces were still allowed to use non-standard fastenings, so long as they provided the relevant tools

Carb Hunt?

It's a public holiday, and there's nothing Australia loves more than a long weekend. So of course we're having a good old fashioned slob day. Neither my Beloved nor I have left our bed, and I doubt my little darlings have done so either.

My Beloved insists that I'm somehow doing carbs, all because my tum is a little rumbly this morning, and I stated out loud my desire for some snackage.

My first thought: Bitch, where?¹.

I don't actually eat

Challenge #01946-E122: Strangers With Candy

TANSTAAFL, or "Invest in Acme income Management, returns of 50 to 70%" Yeah! Right! -- Anon Guest

[AN: For those who don't have familiarity with ancient acronyms, this one stands for, "There Ain't No Such Thing As A Free Lunch"]

Lee Arr and Fred DeShanko were at it again. She recognised the pattern, even though their names weren't easily found in the pamphlet.

Step One: Latch on to some fringe science or stuff so far out on the cutting edge that it's

Well, shit.

I haven't found the time or inclination to contribute to Murder Dollhouse or the nut notes I have on it. And I can't really give another thesis on firkin fanfiction like I did last week.

So I think I'll rabbit on about how tricky it is to work out location details. Especially since I know only what I've seen on TV about how America works. And I don't really want to set this in Australia because only Australians want to read about

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Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

Merry Pripa's Day

Challenge #01951-E127: Posthumous Communication

Sneezin', Wheezin' and CYCLONE Season

Challenge #01950-E126: What is Life and What is Real

Aah, Friday

Challenge #01949-E125: Naked Without it

BBC SOP - FEFO

Four Episodes, Fuck Off

Challenge #01948-E124: Who's a Good Dog?

Well, Fuck

Challenge #01947-E123: Loose End Tied

My Face Hurts

Challenge #01946-E122: Change for the Better

Carb Hunt?

Challenge #01946-E122: Strangers With Candy

Well, shit.