Dear Diary

I have a weekend!

Things are coming together.

I have the money in the bank. I have an experiment in progress that I won't check for a bit. I have some savings that puts my $4K up by quite the notch.

If my change of habits has made a miracle, and I don't need to get my compy seen to... then I might just have enough squirrelled away for my very own actual FIRST LAPPY!

Which would be firkin awesome.

I gotta get onto my Ko-fi account and change my goal to save for. And I don't know what next big thing I should shoot for. Maybe pay for my half of the bills. That's be cool. And a relief on my love, too.

Not that that can stay, either. I get the feeling that Ko-fi goals should change.

Nobody tells me squat about anything, of course. Guidance from someone who knows this shit would be nice. Hint. Hint.

I don't know what's going on with Patreon and who sees what when. I don't know what I should be doing with my Ko-fi. I don't know shit about shit. I'm learning by stumbling along and trying things out and hoping that someone comes along and puts my under their sheltering wing and be like:

"Child. CHILD. This is the shit you have to do and in this order to make what you've started be GOOD."

And then I can go do that.

But there is no sheltering wing. Not even a clever little chick who's prepared to teach this goose on a Your Grandma level. To extend the bird metaphor.

Or I need to poke around and see what others are doing and at what intervals.

And I need to sell myself.

In the Unfucking My Life news: I managed 1K words yesterday, and I aim to get another 1K in during the process of today. If I don't make it, I won't stress. I can push myself to this level of output, but fixing Rael comes secondary to writing Clockwork Souls and if I'm 2K ahead of my 12K patch, then that's a bonus.

And when my back hurts and I need to stretch, I'm going to take that fragment of me-time.

So... a brief pause for me before I get on with the Blasts and the Instants this morning.

An Experiment

I have followed my dear family's advice and bookmarked the bajillions of browser tabs that I used to have open.

If this turns out to be the thing that was clogging my compy, then I shall publicly label myself a derpy derpington from derpton who derps all the live long day. Because I would be a massive derp.

The plus side of this being that I would then have $4K AUD to put towards a new lappy. Yay.

Which, in turn, would

Back to... normal?

I think I have things worked out. Apart from the whole "owning a credit card" thing. Which I still haven't shifted myself for and probably won't today.

I have arranged things so I can do just about everything I need to do on the lappy. Yay. Including putting the Instants Master File up on the cloud. Huge deal. Each Year of Instants is pretty huge, but five of them? That's firkin enormous.

I put the money for my new compy/repaired compy

I've got this.

[AN: This should have been posted yesterday. Sorry about that]

The AC has crashed in my main parlour of employment, turning the entire room and anyone in there into humid, sticky goop incapable of rational thought.

And since I was running around, most of yesterday, I didn't do any of the post scheduling that my prescient past self had already done this Friday past.

However, it's too hot in my office to use the computer on the regular, so I have to

Inertia

It takes practically all morning to convince my little darlings into getting ready for the day. Especially the mandatory daily bathing.

If they didn't fart around so much in getting clean, they'd have more time for farting around on the fun stuff.

Of course, they don't understand this and waste all of everyone's time in delay and denial and end up having no fun at all, resenting me for trying to get them to do stuff, and starting the cycle again the

::Deep breath:: Fuck.

Monday. Following a weekend that was possibly 40% travel 30% hard beds, and 20% what the fuck are we gonna EAT? Leaving 10% for the socialisation that we actually went there to do.

It is possible to go on a Leyland's Tour and stick to Keto, but it's something of an uphill battle, at times. If all else fails, you can order a salad at Maccas, or go pick up something at a Coles. And there's always cheese cubes. Or cheese that

Ugh.

The real trouble with overnight accommodations is the shit you're willing to put up with for "just one night". The pillow's understuffed for me, but it's just one night. The bed's too hard for me, but it's just one night. The air con has no middle ground between freezing cold and stuffy warmth, but it's just one night...

And on it goes. Little minor annoyances that mount up to sleeping tense, sleeping really lightly, and not getting in a good sleep at

Adventure?

We're travelling this weekend, and all my faithful readers here will know that I do not travel well. It's a long way to Bundaberg, and we will be staying overnight.

So therefore, I will be a wreck by Monday.

If I'm driving, we will be listening to MBMBAM, pronounced, M' bimbam. And short for My Brother, My Brother, and Me another brilliantly hilarious podcast by the Brothers McElroy. They take daft questions from the interwebs and turn them into ridiculous answers. It's

So close...

I have 1 721 Steem. One thousand, seven hundred and twenty one. I need a solid eighteen hundred to have enough steem to get enough bitcoin to change into enough money to FINALLY get my Compy fixeded.

And buy my very own laptop that's 100% mine and I never have to worry about what sacrifices to make ever again. Yay.

Or it would have been if Bitcoin's value hadn't sunk like a stone, recently.

Now I have to save up to 2K

I Need a Break

Financial, emotional, whatever. No matter what relief I need, the only break I'm ever offered is skeletal.

We're overspending. And my finances mount up to a quarter of Beloved's income. The remainder of that does not cover the bills. And to put things into perspective, I can't just go out and flip burgers. I'm forty-five. I have few marketable skills. I'm not going to be preferred over someone else who can work for less, for longer.

Should I try to re-enter the

LATE!

I should have posted my Patreon stuff yesterday, but the distraction of being a lazy goldbrick got in my way. So I made myself post it this morning.

Yay.

And I can't help thinking that I skipped a week. Can't fathom how or when that happened. Nobody talks to me about this stuff. Even MeMum has stopped bothering me about the tardy stuff.

Autumn has more or less officially begun. Translated - I have put on Jeans for the first time this

Okay. I can do this.

Ever had one of those days when inertia feels like the better option?

I'm feeling the thrall of soft pillows and warm blankets. And maybe a big burly bloke named Bruce to straighten my spine out for a change. And his "good pal" Sven to work the knots outta my muscles.

...ah, fantasy...

Ahem.

What I want to do and what I must do are two different things. Despite the fact that lounging around all day and scrolling through Tumblr is way

Onwards, ever onwards.

My 2nd-hand lappy has run out of disk space. Again. None of the adjustments I've made are having an effect. I still can't get Beloved to decide which programs on there are superfluous to their needs for the thing, if any actually exist.

In nine days, I should have the Steem needed to have some bitcoins to turn into cashola to buy my very own compy and laptop.

And I STILL can't verify my gorram bank account on the transfer system as

...focus? What focus?

I was having a lovely lie-in this morning and realised -hey- I should probably do that instant story thing.

Two hours later and I'm reading other people's fanfics and getting even more ideas for stories that I shouldn't be writing because I still have these other ones I'm working on and -- wow, that's a real pretty headcannon they have going there...

Whoops.

I guess I'd rather be fanficcing today. Or just blowing the entire day off and lounging around and not

Back to what passes for normal

You're all caught up, and my archives are a little skewiff, but every Instant I've written is officially UP on this site. Yay.

It's not in chronological order any more, but whatever. It's UP. And I'm done with that. And I'm sincerely hoping that the return to the old pattern doesn't flakk things up as badly as the transfer to the new pattern did.

But I know me. I like having patterns of behaviour. Going back can be just as jarring as

Menu

A 3684-post collection

I have a weekend!

An Experiment

Back to... normal?

I've got this.

Inertia

::Deep breath:: Fuck.

Ugh.

Adventure?

So close...

I Need a Break

LATE!

Okay. I can do this.

Onwards, ever onwards.

...focus? What focus?

Back to what passes for normal