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InterNutter

Indie writer seeks audience with an audience. Paying customers welcome. [pronouns: ze/hir] Daily free stories happen because it is an excellent counter to Writers' Block.

Burpengary East http://www.cmweller.com 12161 posts

Cue "Yakety Sax"

That's "The Benny Hill Theme" to many of you dear readers. Ideal music for running about like a chook after a chook with a curly grub.

So this was yesterday:

  • Get Chaos ready for her psych visit
  • Forget to urge Mayhem into motion
  • See Beloved off to work
  • Prepare for a long-arse trip there and back again
  • Just as it's time to go, realise that Mayhem fell asleep instead of getting ready and have an emotional blowout
  • Drive Mayhem to school
  • Realise I forgot to put dinner on
  • Realise that the car I'm borrowing (because I'm picking up a dryer later on) is almost out of fuel1
  • Realise that we also forgot the entertainment and power cells at home
  • Refuel car, smashing left thumb in process
  • Run home and put dinner on
  • Realise that Chaos has lost her recharger and loan her my iPad
  • Forget sunglasses and own lunchable snacks on the countertop like a dummins
  • Realise this at the point of no return for ferrying Chaos to her shrink
  • Two hour trip to Maroochydore
  • Hurry up and wait, followed by shrink visit2
  • Phone the people who might have our new dryer (they had it! Yay!)
  • Two hour plus trip to Caloundra to get to the place that's selling the dryer
  • They won't take Beloved's card without Beloved and Beloved's ID attached
  • Phone Beloved, who then orders the damn thing online (I had to read them their own dang card)
  • Pony up to the front desk with order number, ID, and my own assurance that yes, we are SO's
  • Get paperwork to fetch the dryer
  • Rattle around to the back of the shop to pick it up
  • Hurry up and wait, followed by actually getting the dang thing in the car
  • Drive home (roughly half an hour)
  • Get 1000 kilograms of dryer (I shit you not) out of the dang car so that both my kids can fit in
  • Also get same mass of dryer into the house in case weather
  • Half hour breather in the AC (::angel sounds::)
  • Fetch Mayhem
  • Collapse

And during all this, my longest, bestest friend is having a crisis because everyone else in the world has lead in their butts. Stay strong, friendo, everything will come into place. Trust in providence. Sometimes, aggressively so.

And this is today:

  • See Beloved off to work
  • Organise both little darlings for school
  • Do my Instant
  • Go to my shrink for what could possibly be an official diagnosis after 40-some years of just being bizarre
  • Sometime in there, do more work on my novel
  • Come home and DO SOME FIRKIN LAUNDRY FFS
  • Slot in time for some semi-serious doodles for the Sleep Evil Sleep project (which I am also having panic fits about)
  • Slot in some time to work on a project for an online alias I have
  • Somehow arrange dinner3
  • Fetch the kids
  • And probably collapse

And this is all before I get smeared with the Fuckup Factor. If yesterday's comedy of errors is any precedent, I'm in for an entirely sideways week. Because it includes swapping my license plates for cool new personalised ones, which also includes a run-around, paperwork and hurry-up-and-wait :P

And we still haven't got back to doing our exercises as of yet.

Urghh...

  1. Thanks, my love, for never firkin checking that until it's nearly too late. ↩

  2. And some time in here, do some work on my book... ↩

  3. At this point, I am certain that it's going to be yesterday's dinner with more veg thrown in and a little more water. ↩

Challenge #01504-D043: Puzzling Piece

“And when you’re young you want to fit in. Hell, I still want to fit in with certain [sophonts], but as you get older you get a little more discriminating.” - Carrie Fisher -- RecklessPrudence

Even when he didn't have the words for it, Rael knew that he was different from his creche sibs. They were able to do more, work more efficiently. They didn't need as much of the hosts of chemicals they regularly added to Rael's mostly-liquid body. They

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AUGH!

Our dryer is officially dead on a day when we need it the most, what with the sky deciding that today is a lovely day to frell up my plans to actually slot in some firkin laundry before the day really gets hot.

For the record, it's already 25C (78F) at half-past six in the morning, and humid with it. Bleh. And it only promises to get hotter and muggier throughout the remains of the day.

This is the sort of weather

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Challenge #01504-D043: Self-lost Man

“I don’t feel very much like Pooh today,“ said Pooh.

“There there,” said Piglet. “I’ll bring you tea and honey until you do.” -- Anon Guest

Ax'and'l found his human business partner in an odd position in the hallway. His legs were up the wall, and the rest of his body was sprawled across the floor. "You are not due for Silly Season, yet. Are you unwell?"

"I'm not sure. I'm not feelin' myself."

"In a public area? I should

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Schedule changes

My love has new employment. Which will include new hours, apparently. I'm already laying bets as to whether they will hold. But Beloved swears that they will keep hours between 7:30AM and 3:30PM. Which means our morning physical jerks will transform into afternoon exercises and probably gassing about a great many things.

I'm looking forward to exercising again.

I'm also browsing the news and it looks like there might be a National Women's Strike in protest against the 27% pay

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Challenge #01503-D042: One Dull Afternoon in an Ambassadorial Office

“I feel I’m very sane about how crazy I am.” - Carrie Fisher -- RecklessPrudence

Rael slowly turned to glare at Ambassador Shayde. She had said this out of the blue, apropos of nothing, and continued browsing on her personal screens as if nothing had ever happened. He took an educated guess, "Quote of the day?"

"Twitter feed," said Shayde. "That's definitely sommat I missed out on. One hundred and forty letters tae say somethin' cool. Brevity bein' th' soul o'

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Vital statistics

This Saturday Statistics is marred by the fact that we've run out of some of our blood sticks. So all my blood levels are "no data" until we get more of them. Bonus - I don't have to stick my finger with a sharp object for a little while.

And after that tiniest of small mercies, from last week:

Weight: 78.5 kg
Fat weight: 32.8 kg
Waist/Height: 0.529
Blood Sugar: no data
Blood Ketones: no data
Breath Ketones:

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Challenge #01502-D041: Inconvenienced

“In my opinion, a problem derails your life and an inconvenience is not being able to get a nice seat on the un-derailed train.” - Carrie Fisher -- RecklessPrudence

"This is an enormous problem," opined the Ambassador for Greater Deregulation (Second West). "ANd if we have a problem, then you're going to have a problem."

This sounded like a threat... but the logic behind it escaped Drixal. "I beg your pardon," she said. "I was under the impression that you needed vital

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All's well

I did an IPC meeting at Chaos' school today and she is having zero problems with class. I may have also volunteered to help with the English part of the curriculum.

And I'll be talking to a class where some of the kids don't even want to write a sentence. Mind you, the sentence starters are kind of dull and nobody likes sentences like that.

But the way to start a story is with a good sentence. I need to go gather

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Challenge #01501-D040: Dis-possessed

"There is no room for demons, when you're already self-possessed" - Carrie Fisher -- RecklessPrudence

The demon Az'bar'bijol, once summoned, launched itself at the luckless human who was foolish enough to read its incantation out loud. And almost got the spiritual equivalent of a concussion when it was repelled by a possessing force already in residence, so to speak.

"Nice try," said the human. "But you can't do that with me. And... soon as I whip up a binding spell, you won't

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Getting into the swing of it

It's taken us a few weeks, but we're getting there. Even with the recent gastric distress, there's a rhythm to things.

Get up, ablute, take my weight - I'm still below 80 kilos despite bouncing back from the bug. Rouse the kids, get dressed, chase my little darlings into getting ready for the day. Chaos packs a three course meal, Mayhem packs a boiled egg or two. Make sure they're both groomed, and then try and get Beloved going for the day.

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Challenge #01500-D039: Guarded Mundanity

“There is no point at which you can say, ‘Well, I’m successful now. I might as well take a nap'.” - Carrie Fisher -- RecklessPrudence

Success is the closest thing there is to perpetual motion. One begins by striving for it. Once it is obtained once, the struggle becomes to maintain it. After that, success becomes a higher rung. Higher and higher. Almost impossible to attain. With more people admiring and watching, there are higher standards from everyone.

Only those who

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mrbldyglr...

I messed up my sleep cycle again, which means I can't really tell if I'm still sick or not. One of my wake-up routines is a whole bunch of sneezing.

I made the mistake of trying to sleep at 3AM, so I'm tired as hell. With all good luck, I shouldn't need a coffee, but if I do, we now have xylitol. An all-natural sweetener that tastes like sugar but doesn't set off the insulin responses. And I managed to grab the

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Challenge #01499-D038: World-Changing Invention

Imagine the real results of Star Trek's Transporter technology. -- Anon Guest

It was for cargo, initially. And of course there were a subset of the populace who preferred things transported the old-fashioned way. Some who claimed to taste the difference. But by and large, many people didn't care. You could beam produce straight from the farm to the store, with very little in the way of processing in-between.

People noticed when their food was fresher and lasted longer. People also noticed

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Good News, Bad News

Good news: Beloved is on the mend.

Bad news: It took seven hours in hospital and three litres of saline drip to restore their health. And to add insult to injury, they couldn't figure out what was wrong with them.

Good news: I have my appetite back.

Bad news: I'm still tired as all get-out.

Beloved's had plenty of time to read up on random stuff, and it might actually be the magnesium compounds I've been taking because magnesium is good for

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