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Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

Challenge #01006-B274: Love Cancels Out

http://soggywarmpockets.tumblr.com/post/131148066044

Any expansion on this presumably adorable relationship. -- Anon Guest

[AN: That post makes me LOL every time]

It was fairly common to see Barbarians and Bards as couples, but an Evil-aligned Barbarian and a Good-aligned Bard? That caused some talk. Especially when they started.

Both their parties had disowned them. The Evil Overlord whatsisface had essentially excommunicated Borgog, and the Good King somebeardedguy had declared Tuergar Trueheart a traitor to his people.

Tears, of course, were shed. But they had each other. Alone together against the world.

Borgog burned in the sunshine, and Tuergar felt trapped in dungeons. It was... difficult... finding somewhere they could be together. Even in the True Neutral territories. They eventually settled on a nice cave with natural skylights. Green grass and flowers grew. Tuergar charmed nearby beasts and turned the other way when Borgog slaughtered them for their meals.

The blood and bone made their flowers bloom. Including prize-winning Dahlias. Borgog never knew he had a talent for flowers.

Every now and again, a wandering Munchkin tried to take them on for some kind of bounty. They often found themselves invited to dinner, owing to a series of natural ones.

It made the two of them laugh. It was, after all, how they got started.

(Muse food remaining: 12. Submit a Prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories! Or comment below!)

Uuuuuggggh...

Panic stations, full speed ahead.

$600 owing on Chaos' autism school. The only plus side is this is the last payment ever for a $1.3K/Semester tuition fee.

$600 owing to the vet because I panicked and took the cat to the vet and tests for cancer are spelled with multiple dollar signs.

MeMum has promised me some cash, BUT... I can't spend it on the cat. So - food and petrol :P Also, I have to collect it in person.

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Challenge #01005-B273: Bird Spotting

The cassowary is basically a smaller emu which was apparently created in response to complaints that emus were too sane and peaceable. -- RecklessPrudence

[AN: You have seen that vine where Emus don't know how to handle a Weasel Ball... right?]

"Let me get this straight. There is a flightless bird native to your planet of origin that is, on average, one point four five Distance Units and Fifty-five Weight units of murderous intent in feathers... and it is the saner counterpart

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Three cheers for cheap shops

Everyone in my area is suffering from budgetary problems, these days. And since everyone has less money to throw around, places to get things for cheap are starting to proliferate.

We've had three dollar shops in my favourite shopping zone for quite some time. The maximum we've had is five, during the worst of economic crises to date.

Well, this time, the cheap food places are proliferating. Not only are there two Aldi's within fifteen minutes of home, but there's a discount

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Challenge #01004-B272: The Power of Chatter

A truly well-meaning superhero with middling-high durability, but apparently no other power. However, at their darkest moment, when they are at their enemy's mercy, they find they have a subtle, near-impossible to discover, but devastating power.

Any monologue given by someone with evil intent, causes a reality-warping effect that removes their advantage. Whether that be removing the /villain's/ powers, shorting out their Doomsday Device, or simply distracting them for /just/ long enough. The problem now is, they have to reliably get villains

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Adventures!

Sundays and Tuesdays are Beloved's days off from April to just after November [long story]. So those are the days that Beloved and I have our little adventures.

For example: Last Tuesday, Beloved took us all on a budget-busting trip to Costco in an effort to save us some money in the long term. Short term? Not so much.

Today, I have actually found a factory outlet place that is not located in the extreme back of Burke or another state or

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Challenge #01003-B271: A Real Powderkeg

As the size of an explosion increases, the number of social situations it is incapable of solving approaches zero. - Vaarsuvius -- RecklessPrudence

[AN: "And that would be wrong." :D ]

One would think that the ability to make things explode when you were feeling embarrassed would be a curse. Possibly because people immediately think of blowing up the person making them cringe.

I didn't think of it. You thought of it. What does that say about you?

Being socially awkward is a

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Trapped!

(Have a random SPG lorefic that I finally finished yesterday)

Disclaimer: Steam Powered Giraffe is owned by David and Isabella Bennett... and possibly Sam Luke. I claim nothing but my own words below.

AN: Inspired by this post: http://spooky-robot.tumblr.com/post/130837401424/1950

Trapped!

InterNutter

1950.

The Spine had expected to find Rabbit chatting to Ma and Pappy's gravestones. After three wars[1], it was strange to think that Rabbit would not understand what death was. And yet... Rabbit kept

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Challenge #01002-B270: Suck it, Scheherazade!

As far as I am aware, Australia is the only country in the world that eats every theoretically edible part of its national coat of arms (well, stars and crosses... bikkie form?) Roo (lean red meat, the animal is less harmful to the environment than cattle or sheep), Emu (tastes like chicken - well, kinda gamey chicken), and Wattle (seeds make a sweet flour), all eaten.

Although I guess for some countries that would be quite difficult, since they're cheating with having

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Today's the day!

In just a few moments, I will be putting thought to words for my one thousand and second story. I have beat Scheherazade.

So of firkin course I've woken at 2AM and am in sore need of caffeine.

My sleep cycle needs training wheels. And my coffee needs so much sugar that I'll definitely loose my teeth. Argh.

Fuckit. I'm getting a cuppa.

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Challenge #01001-B269: Paradise Made

Life was never meant to be fair, which was why you had to stab it in the back from the shadows, and kick it in the balls to make sure it stayed down. -- RecklessPrudence

Some say that where there's life, there's hope. They're idiots. I say, where there's life, there's a target. It's kill or be killed. Nature, red in tooth and claw, has been fighting intelligent folk since the dawn of intelligence.

We're all a pack of wolves, out for

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I'm about to bust a record

The official count for all my Instants is a grand one thousand.

Now what famous anthology of tales is close to that? Oh yes. One thousand and one nights.

I won't crow until I beat that record, so you're safe for today. I've been planning on this for the better part of three years. And by crikey, I am going to celebrate.

Not that I have a lot to toss around as gifts because broke as fuck. All I have is my

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Challenge #01000-B268: One Turmultuous Afternoon in an Evil Keep

Hero: Powered by Love? You? You of all people, your most powerful magic, the attack that can devastate an army of battlemages, reduce a warded fortification and everyone in it to dust, and you claim it's powered by LOVE?!

Villain: Yes. Divorce rates go up measurably every time I use it.

(Bonus if it's a twisted form of a spell that would usually be fueled by the user's love, without consuming it) -- RecklessPrudence

"There's no love spell in the world that

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So close, and yet...

::Cue Days of Our Lives music::

When we last left our heroes, MeMum was in a quantum state between being able to communicate online and not being able to communicate online... Telstra had taken twenty-four hours and counting to get back on a one-hour call-back... and Mayhem had forgotten all his Home Ec. crap at school.

Your humble Author is still poor. That $30 has to spend five business days in transit between PayPal and my bank accounts for no apparent reason.

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Challenge #00998-B267: What a Nice Zoo. May I Live Here?

http://glitch.news/2015-08-27-ai-robot-that-learns-new-words-in-real-time-tells-human-creators-it-will-keep-them-in-a-people-zoo.html

Particularly the final written quote from the android, just before the embedded video. -- RecklessPrudence

Of all the human and allied colonies, the Consortium of Steam is possibly the strangest. Well... at least until you visit B'Nar. But that's another story for another time.

On the prime colony world of New Kazoo, as well as the satellite colonies, ownership is consensual. The owned have as many rights as the owners and sometimes... it is rather hard to

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