Dear Diary

A 3687-post collection

An ounce of prevention...

Weighs heavily on my wrists, unfortunately. The good old Bunnings Brolly is many things. Hardy, durable, reliable, engineered to last in high wind conditions, it opens with one button, it isn't a struggle to shut...

But it isn't exactly the lightest of things to tote around.

If you ever want a bargain brolly that's going to last you, get the big golf umbrellas at Bunnings. They only cost $10 and they look they'll last a lifetime. The place makes their money back from all the free advertising whenever it rains.

I used mine as preparation against perfidious plovers, who were once more conspicuous by their absence. My best guess is that they know what an umbrella means and are keeping their distance.

I may yet rig up some kind of back scabbard so I can carry the umbrella without undue strain on my weak wrists. Or hip scabbard. Whatever. Hip scabbards make more sense in the long run. Back scabbards only look badass.

...I have cardboard toobs... I could probably work something out with spray-on waterproofing and leather straps... Or duct tape.

Eh, I'll let it percolate for a while.

Meanwhile, I have an instant story and as many words as I can cram in before it's time to hussle. Because dear Chaos is out on an adventure with me to Distant Caloundra, there to see an expert to file and sort her into the assistance-appropriate pigeon hole.

At least I have as much paperwork as I could gather, this time. I'm not just an addle-pated Mx Disorganised with my brain full of fog and my mouth full of babble.

But I am in a hurry, today. Here's hoping for a quick prompt.

I learned some things, today

Well, technically in the last 24 hours since I last blogged. In no particular order...

  • An ounce of prevention is worth squid-all nothing if you don't have it with you
  • Plovers can defend their territory in family flocks
  • If you move while they're backing up for another run, you're out of the area much quicker
  • Asthma is a harsh master
  • We don't have enough cellophane to wrap all nine gift baskets
  • When getting bottles from a dollar shop, always buy a spare
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Slow Progress

I took the precaution of packing a parasol on my morning walk. Alas, the plovers who perplexed me previously were not present to persist in piercing my pate. Ah well. Better to look a fool than be one.

So far, I have washed all the bottles [one of the larger jars did not make it through the journey home and I must then nip out and snag a replacement]. I have all my stuff lined up and I have a surprisingly large

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Good morning, territorial flying saurians!

As you know if you read my personal blither, I've taken up walking around the block for my daily fitness regime. In the pre-dawn twilight, it's generally peaceful and nothing much is going on.

Not this morning.

This morning, a lovely pair of nesting murder-birds [aka "plovers" aka Masked Lapwings] decided that my morning walk was personally offensive and invasion of their privacy.

Now, plovers will warn you with their signature 'back off' call of sharp, harsh shrieks [spelled "kee kee kee"

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Whooof...

I made it. Sweat-drenched and out of breath, but I made it. For the record, I made it partially into vertex 6 before I needed the puffer. But just barely.

And I forgot my preventer again. Rotten night, horrible sleep because Beloved was up late working on their side-job, slept in until ten past five. I'm now late for everything.

And I'm currently out of spoons to chase the kids around.

It's going to be an "interesting" morning.

I also have to

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Achievement Unlocked!

Despite going to bed early, and the subsequent early wake-up [approximately 2AM]. Despite the subsequent early morning fanfic session and needing a napnap at a quarter to four in the morning... I managed to trundle myself around the block, starting at ten to five.

And I made it all the way back home.

Without.

Needing.

My puffer.

I think I'm ready for a double-block walk. Which used to be my upper limit before I had my toenail cut in half.

Let's see

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Differences

I was exhausted, yesterday. It made an impact on today, and I haven't been awake for an entire hour yet.

I don't even know what it was, but something really drained my batteries.

Regardless, I woke a little past half an hour beyond when I usually pry open my eyes. Which meant I went through my morning routine in a little bit of a rush.

Which meant I forgot to take my preventer (derp) before I went on my walk.

Which meant

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Well, I fucked up

See yesterday's late text post for the details.

My brain, as the Thomas Dolby song says, is like a sieve. I can forget things at an unknown frequency. I've always had memory trouble. From my days at school to the present. I forget things. I only recall when something else reminds me.

I once forgot to get my medication before a string of public holidays and had to go to hospital because nowhere else was open to sell me meds on the

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I'm getting better

For limited definitions of 'better'. The thing about chronic illness is that it permanently moves your goalposts. Compared to a fit person, or even a medically average person, my goal posts are in the Inflatable Kiddie section.

For example: My highlight today was getting about ten meters past the halfway point in my walk before I needed to use my puffer.

That's progress for me. That's "good".

My prior two walks, I took my puffer as I approached the halfway point. This

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Procrasti... nation

I admit. I'm a dawdler. I found a nice source... several nice sources... of sealing wax... online and ready to ship to my location. I'm debating whether or not it's a good idea because they're upwards of $6 per stick. More if they include sealing paraphernalia.

Artisinal stuff is a niche business. Sealing wax is for historian nerds, steampunks, and bridal supplies... because old timey aesthetic equals romance.

It's cheaper and easier to use domestic candles. I at least have those. And,

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Attempting to start new, good habits

Good morning, dear readers. Today, I'm trying to get healthy on the slow and steady path. I'm overweight and I know it. 99 kilos is more than a few too many.

The Bullshit Medical Indicator reckons I should be at 63-69 kilograms. And we all know how I feel about BMI. It's a predatory tactic used by the weight loss industry to spread eating disorders and call it "healthy".

The last time I was anywhere near weighing sixty kilos was when I

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By crikey, it's hot

Mayhem is powering through the sports drink that I honestly thought would last him the better part of two weeks. More fool me. Chaos has imbibed every last juice box we had.

Mayhem needs the drink he has because it's one of the few things that keep his stomach settled in the heat.

And it's a sticky, humid heat this morning that promises melting delights for all the people who never wanted to melt in the first place.

I'm already getting sweaty.

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Good news, everyone!

The cat is free of the Cone of Shame! Kaloo, kalay, etc.

She still has to stay indoors for another fortnight, just to be certain that she's healed. And we have to apply eye drops.

Better news - we can use human eye drops with no harm to the cat.

Fantastic news - we managed to get all the supplies we need for less than $50. And by "less than", I mean that I got pocket change back.

The Golden Circle Factory

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How to wash a cat's face and other random problems

It's 6:30AM, the temperature in my office is already a balmy 27.5 degrees [82 old school] and Mayhem is not doing so great.

There was upchuck, last night. Which Mayhem thoughtfully allowed to dry. And owing to a scheduling problem, Beloved was not available to help me swab all the scabs off of the cat's eye.

Chaos is being her usual sweet self and doing her star-quality Lump Impersonation instead of looking after herself. I've actually had to tell her

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...fargnax

Despite the combined best efforts of both medicine and myself - Mayhem is still throwing up. We can't nail down the cause and sending him to school is counterproductive.

They don't like him being there if he's upchucking.

Meanwhile, he and I will be working on other causes. Starting with the state of his pig sty room. I'm willing to bet there's at least a cubic meter of assorted rubbish and filthy plates or glasses in there. Getting rid of the nasties

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