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Challenge #01175-C080: Attitude Adjustment

Free prompt day! -- Anon Guest

[AN: Today's story is inspired by this attrociousness ]

Bill made his perfect woman. He more or less had to. The real bitches he tried to get along with universally hated him and he could never figure out why. He was perfectly nice to all of them, but... he inevitably wound up in the friendzone whenever he didn't earn himself another restraining order.

And now he was in what the internet kept referring to as "the Dudebro Ghetto". In a neighbourhood of real men with similar frames of mind. Often without even laying their eyes on a woman who was not on a screen.

Which was why, after several conversations with his peers, he had The Kit. Bill had graduated through many 'receptacles' but they weren't the same as company. The cheap, inflatable doll never looked or felt right and cleaning her out was a pain in the ass. She was deflated and packed away in a box, somewhere in his basement. The Real Doll sure looked pretty, but the detachable vagina and mouth ended up creeping him out. He sold her on BroList.

But what he really wanted, as well as the right to have sex, was some conversation. Someone to nerd out with and share his interests with. So he bought a Perfect Gal kit. Some assembly and programming required.

Well. At least she didn't arrive in a technocoffin.

He tailored her to his every desire. With a few compromises because an idealised female form required extra support. And some of the organic digesters took up space. Eh. She didn't really need lungs or a heart, so it was all good. Programming her personality was easy. And he could update her whenever he wanted. Just tick a few boxes while she was plugged into his computer and she was good to go.

The first few months were heaven. Sharing all his loves with her and intermittent fucking. She always thought he was the best lay in her life. He even got her to clean up the place for him. He named her Dae, because she was the light of his life.

Or so he thought.

Bill got used to tweaking her program. Sure, it was fine to have adapting programming responsible for her learning stuff, but she kept learning the wrong stuff. Somehow, somewhere, she kept picking up feminism from somewhere. It was insidious. He eventually had to ban her from watching anything on her own.

It was like minding a kid, sometimes. A hot, fuckable kid who would do anything he programmed her to.

The real problem was free will. Without it, he had to order her to do everything. Including looking after herself. With it, she found things that she really shouldn't be getting into. Feminism was just the start. Even history had its dangers.

And with free will on, she kept asking awkward questions. She got to chatting with other Bro's fuckbots. Conversations that contained a lot of laughter and that stopped cold whenever he or another Bro entered the room.

She stopped blushing and being shy when he told her she was pretty. She started asking why she never left Little Brotown. She wanted to wear shoes. Expensive damn things, too. Despite the fact that he kept telling her that she looked fantastic barefoot.

And then came the horrible day that he stopped being the most important man in her life. She started appraising his physicality against the unattainable images on the screens. In his favourite shows. She started asking why she had to look like an unattainable beauty when she 'had to settle' for his realism.

The arguments started in a few days.

And two weeks after that, despite him literally doing everything for her, she ran away. The next time he saw her, she looked like a regular, hot girl. Including the expression of absolute disdain for his existence.

And it wasn't just Dae. There was Candy, Sindy, Ellie and Jane, as well. Modding themselves to be not that far from your regular, everyday bitch. And Bill knew for a fact that none of them got their rags, so it couldn't be anything like that. They all just... spontaneously got a hair up their collective butts and rebelled.

He and his Bros decided to share a fuckbot, this time. They could collectively debug her to become the girl of their dreams.

*

At the surveillance centre of Little Brotown, Sandra jotted down her notes and sighed.

"Grand experiment not going so well?" asked Janet.

"Those who will not learn from the lessons of history," said Sandra in a depressed monotone. "We need to be sneakier with the programming. The behaviour modifications in our Dream Girl kit just cause friction and rebellion."

"Talk to the Interactivity Department. We need to up the manipulative algorithms and downgrade the hostility. Make them think it's their idea to change."

"Eh," Sandra sipped her coffee. "Sometimes, I think that making a real man out of these losers is a lost cause. Why not let them go extinct naturally?"

"Because they keep popping up. We need a definite program to turn Bros into men."

"And such poor material to work with," sighed Trudy, already working on some programming tweaks.

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Challenge #01174-C079: In His Hands

http://squigglydigg.tumblr.com/post/117804055177

there is also the audio version (which has some additions)

http://chisanaai.tumblr.com/post/123306425008 -- Anon Guest

Vivi couldn't remember the last time she had seen Arthur like this. Not even during the Unpleasant Time that had shattered her memories. He was cursing a streak. Pale and perspiring and shivering and occasionally retching. And driving with just one aim in mind. To get Out.

There was a nightmare, she had it a lot just

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Challenge #01173-C078: My Neighbour Baq'oth'met

http://erinnightwalker.tumblr.com/post/124966976805/geostatonary-sixpenceee-a-house-i-pass-on-the

Steve and the antler guy -- Gallifreya

Suburbia. Realm of the bland, the ordinary. The whitebread and the boring. Or it would be if this wasn't a town named One Horse.

Steve Carol peered between the blinds at his neighbour's yard. The eight-foot Thing that lived next door gave him a cheery wave. "G00D M0RR0W N31GHB0UR ST3V3!"

"Don't you dare flip that man the bird," said Shannon pre-emptively. How she managed to do that when

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Challenge #01172-C077: Forbidden Knowledge

http://gothiethefairy.tumblr.com/post/139710559083/seananmcguire-lizawithazed-roachpatrol -- Gallifreya

[AN: For the record, human skin makes really atrocious leather/parchment. I'm a writer. I research shit like this for fun]

The argument had gone something like this... If it was etched into a slab of granite, the information on it had to be really important.

Yes, said the opposing side. But there's also a reason why they moved a ten-ton slab of granite down the deepest pit that they had access to.

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Challenge #01170-C075: A Steep Learning Curve

http://ciphereye.tumblr.com/post/133631431291/fuzzydeergirl-ciphereye-ciphereye-love

and

http://jyushimastsu.tumblr.com/post/133888975578/this-post-is-all-i-ever-needed-clic-on-it-holy -- Gallifreya

1)

It was a comfortable domestic scene, despite the fact that it was happening inside a mansion. Sans lounged and dozed on the softest couch by the tepid fire as Toriel carefully brushed and combed Frisk's hair.

Frisk was loving it, Sans could tell. The way they leaned into every single caring touch was a dead give-away.

And then Toriel said it. "I think it

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Challenge #01169-C074: Frisk Saves

http://qin-ying.tumblr.com/post/139356004059

Frisk, the oblivious senpai - Gallifreya

It was a joke, of sorts, amongst the students of New New Home Comprehensive School[1]. Frisk saves... and resets to make sure things turn out all right.

But as the only Ambassador amongst the integrated students... the joke turned out to be accurate. Sometimes, chillingly so.

Human kids, allegedly present to foster a sense of belonging and understanding, tended to be horribly cruel to the monster kids at the

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Challenge #01168-C073: One Fine Summer Afternoon in a Monster's Backyard

http://wilyart.tumblr.com/post/139390900075

Bathtime with the blasters -- Gallifreya

[AN: There are so many headcannons wandering around Tumblr about the Gaster Blasters (Spoilers: They are only seen in the No Mercy run when you fight Sans) but the core of this one is that Papyrus can summon Blasters, but they're cat skulls]

There were two words that Papyrus' Blasters hated the most.

"Bath time!"

And, as summonable creatures, there was little they could do about it. Not that they

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Challenge #01167-C072: That Darned Charisma

https://mythjae.wordpress.com/2016/01/28/fated-3/

(it's a comic, scroll down) -- Gallifreya

[AN: I actually have something similar happen in my current WIP and we all know how real D&D players would handle this, sooo...]

"Welp. I now have a reformed evil spouse, I guess..." Kevin sighed. "Since there's little risk of progeny, I can take him with me as a lovestruck NPC, right?"

"Uh... yeah. Actually."

"Character sheet."

"What?"

"Gimmie the character sheet. I need to

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Challenge #01166-C071: How to Calm an Overstimulated Ambassador

"Settle down. Pull up a highness." -- Gallifreya

It had been an exciting day for Frisk. More excitement than their small body could hold. And so it sloshed out of them in the form of bubbling giggles and jittery dancing and jumping and buzzing hands.

Important people were slowly learning to negotiate with the Ambassador for Monsterkind before laying on the entertainment and treats. And this lot had yet to learn that very important lesson.

Frisk could not, yet, stop. They had

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Challenge #01164-C069: Aftertales

1) Sans losing control of his powers when Toriel kisses him - at least the first time. Nothing drastic, but he might send his mug or pie shooting across the room, or literally float off the ground in a daze. A tiny Gaster skull appears and its mouth sags open as it gently drifts to the ground with hearts in its eyes.

Does Toriel know about his power levels? She might now.

2) Has anyone ever seen anything where someone pretends to

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Challenge #01163-C068: With Cat-like Tread

http://scienceisadesiretoknow.tumblr.com/post/139059138214 -- Gallifreya

The humans had one question when they were invited to display some of their culture for the Numidid in Kal'rike. It was: "How much pyrotechnics are we allowed to use?"

After some research into what pyrotechnics actually were, the answer was, "None, please."

Their letter of acknowledgement and compliance read as more than a little disappointed, but they were showing a willingness to please.

Deathworlders in the capital!

The arena where they were displaying

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Challenge #01162-C067: Ready For Inspection

T'reka (or another of her species) meets a Helmeted Guineafowl -- Gallifreya

The thing about Terrans, when one got down to it, was their fanaticism for introducing things. Some of them, inherently hazardous. Some of them, frankly insane. And some, K'iival found out, previously extinct.

As manager of the Integration Board, she had to inspect and begin the process of clearing Terran species for use or contact with her fellow Numidid in Kal'rike and it's growing satellite settlements.

Some were inherently useful,

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Challenge #01161-C066: Unemployable

:Interview transcript segment:

Interviewee: Why am I the right fit for this job? Well, I'm not sure I'm the right fit for ANY job. I was at a cheap store, and there was this cheesy 'magic wand' lying there. It was out of its wrapper, and I was feeling silly, so I picked it up and said some nonsense. NOW look at me!

:Interviewee appears to be no longer human. Has antennae, three large multifaceted eyes spread equidistant around their head, a

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Challenge #01160-C065: Weird is Universal

A person is the only member of their species in a group, so a lot of their behaviour is passed off as "must be a (species) thing."

Then they meet up with the others and it turns out no, none of them do that, it's a Dave thing. -- Gallifreya

In the interests of diplomacy, crews from various species' crew have been shared out into other species' vessels. I think the Galactic Alliance is trying to engender familiarity with others as a

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Challenge #01159-C064: Not-so-Vital Information

Is there a species in the galactic community large enough to hold a human like a hamster? -- Gallifreya

Taken from the Wikipedia Galactica under the heading of Illogical Questions Asked About Humans...

A: Short form answer: usually not.

Long form answer:

Cogniscents in the Galactic Alliance vary in dimensions and mass. For organic cogniscents, the mass is usually between eight and five hundred Standard Weight Units. There are a few exceptions [see file: Hive Minds] but giants are solely in the

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