Instant Story

Challenge #01696-D235: Functionality

[From one person who got about three hours' sleep, to the person who dumped a new, extremely important, problem in their lap at godawful in the morning, and who they are responsible for]

"Have you slept at all, [Name]?"

"Not at all."

"You should try it sometime. I end up in less trouble when you do." -- RecklessPrudence

...by any other species standards, we just plain don't get tired. -- Archivaas Collective on Humanity's Self-realisation

The news of impending disaster was met by the ship's human with, "For flakk's sake, I just got ready for bed. Again."

This was the first time that Captain K'vaan had heard of the human actually sleeping. They had spent an inordinate amount of rest cycles working through the current crisis. Exhausting five teams of Sciurids before finally claiming they were going to sleep. They then fought through a red alert situation in their sleepwear and stayed conscious through another three Sciurid work shift to avert that crisis.

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Challenge #01695-D234: Unlikely Survival Tactics

[Person #1]: Stop asking hard questions.

[Person #2]: Buddy, if I could stop thinking 'em, I'd stop asking 'em. -- RecklessPrudence

It's very clear that humans are gather-hunters whenever an isolating emergency occurs. Their first instinct is to gather everything they can and use that as a basis for what they do next. Often, this can be displacement activity in situations where the best course of action is to wait for the ERT to come to the rescue.

But there are other

Challenge #01694-D233: They Aren't the Champions

Something nice about all those who will never be champions but compete and play sport, and love it. -- Anon Guest

They say, do what you love, and you will never need to work again. This only really works if one is good at the thing one loves. There are people, out there, who are absolute pants at the thing they love. But they do it anyway, because love is, as the song says, strange.

Case in point, the Arse End Football

Challenge #01693-D232: The Most Dangerous Opponent

"You can’t hold a grudge forever"

“I’m not ‘holding a grudge’, I’m making decisions based on past evidence.” -- RecklessPrudence

"The humans are going to destroy all your careful plans," said the old general. "These are members of a species that coined the phrase, 'no plan ever survives first contact with the enemy'. You could try to learn from that."

The war council turned to stare and General Gerax. He was the last one to famously lose to the

Challenge #01692-D231: Items of Mass Destruction

It was hard not to admire a four-year-old who could disassemble a hygiene unit into so many pieces it took three engineers most of a duty shift to put it back together. -- RecklessPrudence

Of all the destructive items that humanity has in its collective repertoire, the two that cause the most amazement and confoundment are: the average pants pocket, and their own young. Left unsupervised, they can cause more chaos, destruction, and all-out-entropy than the tools actively designed to do so.

Challenge #01691-D230: Dangerous Lifeforms

[Name] wondered if considering that statement to be a fine example of famous last words made them unduly paranoid or just conscious of historical precedent. -- RecklessPrudence

There are numerous, common, famous last words. "I think it's going to be all right," is in the top ten. Likewise, "Hold my beer, I've got this," or, "Hey, watch this!" But of the all-time destined-to-be-last-words, Grax thought that, "Awright, silleh bugurz..." had to be a record-holder for the first prize.

Especially when it came

Challenge #01690-D229: Problems of Scale

"Lets poke it and see what it does?" famous last words or an eureka moment. -- Anon Guest

There is nothing so large and so terrifying that a human won't try to poke it. - Galactic Proverb.

Of all the terrors of the universe, black holes have to be the one that holds a universal horror. Nobody with any sense wants to be anywhere near a black hole. So, of course, humanity figured out how to get a station in a LaGrange

Challenge #01689-D228: Unfortunate Blindness of Today

Nitpicking the small faults and details and eroding the Grand Design. -- Anon Guest

There was no doubt that it was beautiful. Sweeping curves and soaring arches. Every surface in the simulated model glittered with solar panels. Plants hung from gardens on every floor. Wind turbines adorned the rooftops.

"Ladies, Gentlemen, and anyone I missed," announced the designer, "I give you the residence structure of tomorrow. We can build this with extant technology, and improve the city environment one building at a

Challenge #01688-D227: Race to the End of the World

People come and go, the christening you bless will be the funeral you mourn in less than a century. But people keep saying “I love you”, that has to count for something. -- Anon Guest

"Why, though?" complained Holly. "Why does anything mean anything? It's all... it's all for nothing, in the end."

The Doctor sat by her. "I'm two and a half thousand years old. I've seen worlds born. I've seen worlds die. The same for civilisations. And people. The same

Challenge #01687-D226: The City of Ghosts

"The priests and holy-men, they claim those things out there are the restless ghosts of dead gods."

"And what do you think?"

"I'm not so sure they're ghosts." -- Anon Guest

They called this land the Dead Plains. The grasses grew high, but trees would not. Neither deer nor cow would voluntarily graze on the grasses, here. Even horses, an animal universally recognised as rather dim, would not walk into the preternatural flatness of the Dead Plains. And worse, it was fresh

Challenge #01686-D225: Emergency!

Emergency Personnel are trained in response measures so that when something really bad happens, the Training kicks in and they work on auto-pilot till their brain gets over the shock. -- Anon Guest

In an emergency, it's easy to tell the trained personnel from the civilians. The civilians are the ones busy panicking, screaming, running around and generally being useless. It's the job of emergency personnel to wrangle the runners whilst dealing with the problem that caused the upset in the first

Challenge #01685-D224: Alarming Reflection

Traditionally, vampires could not see their reflection because mirrors were silver-backed. With the invention of aluminum-backed mirrors, a vampire sees their reflection for the first time only to find out... they are the ugliest thing they have ever seen. -- Anon Guest

For centuries, Vampires avoided mirrors. Silvered mirrors would not show them, and the ones backed in gold harmed them. Some would have mirrors made that were backed with brass or bronze... but by and large, Vampires avoided mirrors.

Pierce Opal

Challenge #01684-D223: User Unfriendly

A technomancer/techwhisperer who isn't sure that this whole 'machine spirit' thing is any more than people anthropomorphising complex devices that are still just machines, but is usually nice to them anyway. In an unwise moment possibly brought on by a stimulant or fatigue high, improper following of their med regime, when nervous, or possibly all of the above, in front of people they insult their personal machine and say they don't have to be nice to it, all computers like them

Challenge #01683-D222: A Little Lesson

[Title: There's a cat in the box!] River and the TARDIS have decided the Doctor can stand to learn some humility. -- Fliss

The TARDIS, when she briefly had a humanoid body, said that she didn't have speech capabilities. That wasn't quite true. If you knew how to listen, she would communicate with you. Let herself be known.

"He's getting an ego on him," said River. "I agree. Did you hear that last speech? Congratulating himself over how many civilisations have died

Challenge #01682-D221: Mind the Gap

A purpose isn't much of a comfort when there's no satisfaction to be found in it. -- RecklessPrudence

Some people have a grand purpose. They save the universe. They save lives. They even save Time. Most of them save the day. Then there's the people who don't save anyone. Their purpose... my purpose... is to fill the little gaps.

My name is Binraise, and I'm a third-level Administration Clerk.

It's my job to read profiles and recommend courses of action that could

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Challenge #01696-D235: Functionality

Challenge #01695-D234: Unlikely Survival Tactics

Challenge #01694-D233: They Aren't the Champions

Challenge #01693-D232: The Most Dangerous Opponent

Challenge #01692-D231: Items of Mass Destruction

Challenge #01691-D230: Dangerous Lifeforms

Challenge #01690-D229: Problems of Scale

Challenge #01689-D228: Unfortunate Blindness of Today

Challenge #01688-D227: Race to the End of the World

Challenge #01687-D226: The City of Ghosts

Challenge #01686-D225: Emergency!

Challenge #01685-D224: Alarming Reflection

Challenge #01684-D223: User Unfriendly

Challenge #01683-D222: A Little Lesson

Challenge #01682-D221: Mind the Gap