An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Portal Crackfic written before Portal 2 was a thing.
Kurt's idea of volunteering at the animal shelter may not have been the best idea.
(#00158)
“Any previous experience?”
“Ja, I helped rehabilitate a few animals back home,” said Kurt. He decided not to mention the pet raven, deer, squirrels or the nearly-tame wolf. “I’m very good with them.”
“Nothing… professional?”
“Eh… Heirelgart is a little bit… isolated. We had a traveling vet and a traveling doctor. We learned to help ourselves, ne? For a time, I *was* the vet.”
“Mm.” Shuffle shuffle, went the papers on the lady’s desk. “Well, you can start by
Read more »One Thousand Deaths
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Portal crackfic.
Read more »ficwar prompt: Jager shipping wars.
(#00157)
“Aggil!” Xox roared, proving he was a proponent of Agatha/Gil.
“Targatha!” Hollered Drej, proving he was a proponent of Agatha/Tarvek.
“Aggil!”
“Targatha!”
“Aggil!”
“Targatha!”
“RRRHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!”
Pixo kept supping her soup.
“Hyu is not fightink?” asked a so-far casual bystander.
“Hy try to schtay out ov dese tings,” she admitted. “But hy am a liddle fond of Agthar.”
“Agthar?”
“Agatha/Othar.”
The bystander made a face. “Eugh. Hyu haz not goot taste.”
“Which is vhy Hy schtay out ov dese
Read more »amongthegentlymad: imperfectwriting: norwegianblues: THE most underrated scene in the entire movie. It was perfect. And do you know how...
Read more »THE most underrated scene in the entire movie. It was perfect. And do you know how often I see gif sets of it? This is the second one I’ve seen since the movie came out (It’s been over 5 months, now).
So let’s just pause for a moment from reblogging gifs of Tony’s sass, Loki’s sex appeal, or Bruce’s fluffiness and just appreciate this nameless, old, German guy and how, even though he
The Jagerkin: who knew they had such a passion for matchmaking? (and such a lack of talent at it)?
(#00156)
“He iss boy, hyu iss gorl. Vhat more could hyu vant?”
“How about a pulse?” she indicated the man in question. A rather well-preserved mummy in their current oubliette. He had fantastic bone structure, but then… all he was was bone structure. “Or flesh?”
“Hokay, so he needs a liddle of de fixink opp. Since vhen is dot new?”
“I don’t have the equipment, and I’m not exactly certain he’ll be worth the bother. That, and I’ll
Read more »Little Blob Lost
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
DS9 AU crackfic. Stand back.
Read more »Siracha makes anything more edible - theoretically.
(#00155)
“Why is there only a bottle of Siracha in the survival rations?”
“Because the people who packed it assumed that anyone needing it would be able to live off the land. And Siracha, as it says on the lable, makes anything more edible.”
“But I’m allergic and this landscape is entirely poisonous.”
“We shall write a scathing letter to the company the minute we get out of this mess. Pay attention, would you? I’m trying to build a Siracha-powered
Read more »Well, poop.
Mayhem fell over crook halfway through the morning and I had to take him home.
So now I’d better get a shake on with this instant story.
Please stand by.
Read more »Forty-Three Minutes, Twenty Seconds
Forty-Three Minutes, Twenty Seconds
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Ancient Kira/Odo written between seasons, and possibly before _His Way_. Contains smut, violent flashbacks, violence aftermath and babbies.
You have been warned.
Read more »Apologies in advance...
Mayhem and I are going on a little camping trip during the weekend. As a direct result, there may not be any instant stories for 48 hours.
I will attempt to make up for that lack on Sunday evening, depending on how energetic I am at the end of it.
I apologize for the inconvenience.
Read more »geekhyena: myuncertainlife: How do you guys not have a word for that? Mom always called it "Fox's wedding" or "Monkey's wedding", idk...
How do you guys not have a word for that?
Mom always called it “Fox’s wedding” or “Monkey’s wedding”, idk where she got it from. My grandma called it a sunshower.
Aussies call it “liquid sunshine”. FYI
Read more »
Flotsam
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
Flotsam in it’s loquacious entirety. Up on AO3.
Read more »"Due to last year's incident involving "The Ballad of Cemetery Sue", the lyrics and/or script of any act in the talent show must be approved...
(#00154)
The entire nerd portion of the school moaned in disappointment. They all knew what it meant. The next talent show would be stripped, pasteurized, sanitized and otherwise made dull, bland, and completely boring.
“And I was going to juggle a chainsaw, a bowling ball, and a fresh egg,” whined Kurt.
Only one was cackling.
“Sara, no-o-o-o-o-o…” said Todd, possibly on automatic.
“But I was going to give them exactly what they wanted, and nothing of what they asked for,” protested Sara.
Read more »Young Knights and Old Soldiers
Read more »Saw this quote online, figured it might inspire something interesting.
“Hoping to find a ‘knight in shining armor’ is a worthless dream. His blade razor-edged, his shield polished, his breastplate ornately-gilded, they say only this - that his experience in battle is nothing, and his courage has never been tested. He has nothing but ambition and optimism in his corner, and he could easily falter and flee when that shine fades. Hope instead to find the steadfast soldier in