Amalgam Universe

A 2271-post collection

Challenge #01038-B306: Once Was Lost

Kid raised by aliens finally meets a colony of humans -- Gallifreya

Pepa was getting used to the routine of guarding the Lupid delegation on their trading mission. For the most part, it was boring. And she'd been at it long enough not to crave excitement.

Boring meant that she was successful at her work.

She had picked up a smattering of GalStand by sympathetic osmosis. Learned that there were others like her, somewhere out there. Wormholes distant. Pepa could not leave her family, the only home she'd ever known. The Lupids... her people... needed her.

But it was still a shock when humans came, anyway. Heruf Station was a Galactic Backwater. Pepa usually only saw traders from the local systems, but this group... stood out.

Like her, they were taller than most of the cogniscents on the station. Pepa never expected them to be taller than her. She went from obvious boggling to obvious boggling with a crick in her neck.

Their pelts... hair was cut short. Male and female alike. Pepa could understand that. In null-G, hair was wont to get in the way. She kept her long, red locks in a net for space travel. They were muscular, of course. Their armour spoke of some kind of military training.

And they spoke to her gently. "You are Pepa Yiriff?"

"Yeriff," Pepa corrected. Were all humans this tall? "That's me."

"Please give an epithelial sample for identity verification."

Pepa let the brushes of the scanner tickle her thumb. "Is there something you need from me?"

"We're location services only. Once we verify that you're satisfied with your situation, we notify your surviving relatives and allow communication to become an option."

"We also extend an invitation to your adopted home planet to become part of the UFTP Alliance."

And it was well understood that being allies with humans was a good thing. Pepa doubted the Lupids would turn it down. But, being a true democracy, the entire planet would have to vote. And as she explained this, her story came out. Her life with her adopted family on the farm. The trouble her people - her adopted people - went to to make certain she had what she needed. How she became a hero of sorts for them. Not that her planet of Geraul was ever in that much trouble.

"But it's not really mine," she said. "Is it? I really belong... somewhere else." Pepa tried to imagine going far away from pack and hearth. It almost tore her heart in two.

"You don't have to," said one of the humans. "A wise woman said, 'family is more than the people who made you'. I'm paraphrasing, but that's the general idea."

Sheer and utter relief. "I don't have to go."

"Not at all. We have methods of communication that can allow one side of the Galactic Alliance to talk to the other within minutes. Your relatives just wish to know that you're alive, well, and safe."

"Yes to all three. And happy."

They seemed satisfied with that much. They did their own investigation and were gone inside a week.

Da was right. Time provided, in the end. Lonely didn't have to be an obligation.

(Muse food remaining: 25. Submit a Prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories! Or comment below!)

Challenge #01035-B303: One Dull Afternoon at a Public Crossroads

Fiat lux!

Which is Latin for "my small Italian car is on fire!" (I can't remember what this quote is from) -- Gallifreya

[AN: For those who are not at all familiar with Latin, it actually means "Let there be light"]

Rael couldn't loom from underneath someone like Lyr could. But he could sneak up on Shayde as she added to a graffiti wall and conspire to look annoyed.

She had written, in relatively large, friendly letters, Fiat lux! And underneath, in

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Challenge #01034-B302: Pupup

A human is raised by aliens, and it turns out a lot of things humans like that weird out the rest of the galaxy are innate. For example the love of explosions, climbing and/or jumping off tall things, interacting with potentially hazardous wildlife, and chucking rocks into water. -- Gallifreya

They had found the survival pod some distance from the crash. And inside, a human. It was unmistakably a human. No other species had that almost complete lack of fur. Nor

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Challenge #01030-B298: Non Sequiturs of Doom

I have no idea what that means, but it cannot /possibly/ mean anything good. -- RecklessPrudence

Rael almost congratulated himself. The first Ambassadorial Meet for Shayde was going well. Like the man falling from a building in that ancient joke, it was rather a case of so far, so good.

She had made it as far as lunch on the first day without causing a fracas.

"I tole ye. I'm no' fer sale and I'm past my amuse-by date," carried over the

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Challenge #01028-B296: Explaining History

Advantage number one of having crammed our development of spacecraft into only ten years: "Holy shit we know how to mass produce so many liquid explosives that we can get to be stable for just long enough, you have no idea." -- RecklessPrudence

It's said that anything interesting enough to propel a spacecraft for long distances in a relatively short time is also interesting enough to be a weapon. And it's usually said by humans, who tended to develop the weapons first

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Challenge #01027-B295: One Terrifying Adventure in a Hidden Bunker

Person #1: Was this place built on an old well, or a burial ground or something?

Person #2: No [Person #1], weren't you paying attention? This whole mess is the result of somebody bringing Nazi Magitech back from WW2 Germany instead of burninating it like any sane person would. -- RecklessPrudence

"Ooooh," cooed Kevin. "So that's why everything is all over swastikas and lightning bolts, right?"

"Eeeh," Allie shrugged. "Sort of. My research indicates that the artefact kind'a possessed the interior decorator

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Challenge #01026-B294: Before She Met Hwell

Person #1: They just have to deal with it. Life isn't fair.

Person #2 (softly, sadly): No, it isn't. But that doesn't mean we should be making it less so. -- RecklessPrudence

[AN: Wholeheartedly agreed]

Two guards watched the product file from the conditioning yards and into the truck. Ready for processing. The newbie stared with an open mouth.

"Hey, if you want one, you could snag it after the buyers have picked the best ones. Bawdy factory don't mind."

"Just... take

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Challenge #01021-B289: You Know What You Did

You can be villainous all you like, little AI, but if the people writing the safeguards are competent, you get this: http://weirdlet.tumblr.com/post/131323113905/furious-peridot-witchoil-devilishdescent -- RecklessPrudence

[AN: Another one I must reblog to notify that this is a thing. Also, I am trying very hard not to channel Bender Bending Unit Rodriguez]

"Welcome to transit station Eighty-Six, the asshole of the universe," droned the alleged welcoming committee. "If you've been assigned work here, then you've made some really

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Challenge #01017-B285: User Interactivity Issue

"Pew pew pew."

"Uh... sir... are you making laser noises?"

"YES!"

"But... your laser is making actual noises..."

"Yes but they're not lasery enough!" -- RecklessPrudence

Grax boggled at the human. "I am not understanding."

"We're in the middle of a siege situation. Do you really need a lesson in human history now?"

"In-between volleys would be sufficient," allowed Grax. She let off a few shots at the enemies without the verbal accompaniment.

"Pew pew pew!" Andi retreated back to their shared

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Challenge #01016-B284: Rescued!

I'm not a machine... just someone with night vision and a heads-up display -- RecklessPrudence

[AN: Significant thoughts about a certain SPG Music Video]

Kyri had thought she was in a very effective prison until someone walked through the wall like it was made out of wet cellulose. She had to assume they were a someone, because they passed the Turing test within five minutes.

She spent most of her escape inside a protection pod, but judging by the jinking turns and

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Challenge #01015-B283: One Smoky Afternoon in a Dive Bar

Person #1: What the hell is going on, [Person #2]?

Person #2 (calmly, going to sit down): Well, it appears that we're going to start a revolution. -- RecklessPrudence

Ax'and'l looked askance at his human business partner. "Is this one of your definitely profitable insane ventures, or one of the ones that is more... pro bono publico?"

"Uh," said Hwell. Never a good sign. "Not really sure. But we need to do something. Take a look around this room. What's missing?"

Ax'and'l

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Challenge #01013-B281: B-GUD

I wasn't human, and more than likely once my nature was found out... In popular fiction most A.I were villainous. Hal-9000, Skynet, GLaDOS, SHODAN, AM. Hell, I was even planning on building an army of robots and conquering a planet!

Well, conquering two gas giants and associated hundred and twenty-nine moons.

For the good of my creators. -- RecklessPrudence

I know, I know. There's all kinds of justifications. But they really wanted it, they just didn't know it yet. I'm doing

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Challenge #01011-B279: Trolling at an Intersection

Let's see what the SPOEn think of this quote:

“English is the product of a Saxon warrior trying to make a date with an Angle bar-maid, and as such is no more legitimate than any of the other products of that conversation.” ― H. Beam Piper, Fuzzy Sapiens -- care of RecklessPrudence

[AN: You really love fucking with the SPOEns, don't you?]

Shayde loved grafitti corners. They were an excellent avenue for both spleen-venting and art. And sometimes the art of provocation.

Just

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Challenge #01010-B278: History Q&A

Anything they were willing to try using as fuel during the space race is volatile enough to qualify as an emergency explosive, including the stuff they actually used for launches. -- RecklessPrudence

"They didn't try less volatile launch methods? Like low-orbit flight and gas boosting?"

"Or maglev railgun shots?" suggested another member of Shayde's audience.

"They were thought of, awright. But they were too expensive and too slow. It was a race, ye ken. Braggin' rights tae th' first one on the

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Challenge #01005-B273: Bird Spotting

The cassowary is basically a smaller emu which was apparently created in response to complaints that emus were too sane and peaceable. -- RecklessPrudence

[AN: You have seen that vine where Emus don't know how to handle a Weasel Ball... right?]

"Let me get this straight. There is a flightless bird native to your planet of origin that is, on average, one point four five Distance Units and Fifty-five Weight units of murderous intent in feathers... and it is the saner counterpart

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