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A 4676-post collection

Challenge #00669 - A304: Methods of Madness

When the last trumpet sounds and the beast rises from the pit, we will not kill it. We will ride it.

Jorgi the Page remembered when the Sorcerer’s summoned demon began pulling out its hair. The beast was still chafing at its magical bit and had managed to get into Kragdar’s knapsack.

Jorgi caught her looking into a crystal sphere, late one night.

“What are you doing?” Jorgi whispered. “The master forbade you from interfering with our things.”

“Na, he forbade me from wreckin’ ‘em. Nowt about looking’. Nowt about touchin’.” She was a strange demon. Were it not for her too-large, glowing eyes, Jorgi could easily mistake her for human. Though the combination of shadow-dark skin and smoke-white hair was usually only found in the elderly.

And no human had fangs or talons like this thing.

The creature who called herself Shayde carefully rolled the sphere back into Kragdar the Sorcerer’s knapsack and put it back the way Jorgi had left it.

“See? No harm done.” She reached up to her head, and pulled out three strands of hair. One by one.

Ever after that day, Shayde was perpetually braiding, or piercing herself to add her blood to the impossibly thin twine she was making of her own hair. She muttered spells in some foreign tongue she called ‘Welsh’. They were not counter to their quest, though they did alarm Yrg the Barbarian.

It became normal, over their months of travel. If Shayde’s fingers weren’t busy with her hair-and-blood twine, then she was unconscious or doing the bidding of Kragdar. Helping them fight the forces of evil.

But when they came to Nemyss, the ultimate evil they had been sent to vanquish… that was when the cord Shayde had been weaving came into play. Nemyss summoned her own demon. A much more… demon-y demon. A giant serpent made of fangs and tentacles and leathery embellishments that resembled bats’ wings.

Jorgi almost wet herself.

Shayde tied off her hair braid and, with a complicated movement, turned it into a lasso. She caught the beast and the thin thread held. The beast dragged her off the ground, and the thread held. She looped it further around its maw and turned it into a bridle.

And the great serpent bucked and writhed but Shayde would not let it go. It struggled and bit and howled… and the thin web of hair and blood held fast.

She tamed it. Wore it down. Soothed it into domesticity. Leaving the others free to defeat Nemyss on his own turf.

“It’s no big trick,” said Shayde as she scratched one of the serpent’s phalanges. It rumbled an earthquake of a purr. “Hair and blood of a virgin. Words of purpose in an ancient tongue. Any ancient tongue will do.”

“That’s…” Kragdar boggled. “That’s almost mud-magic.”

“It’s life magic. Ye could’a explained. I’d have done it wi’out the manacles.”

“Life magic? No demon can wield life magic.”

Sigh. “I been tellin’ ye all year. I ain’t a demon.”

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The Best Genes Money Can Buy...

Adam stared past the mirror-glass and into his own eyes. They were perfect in place and symmetry, blue as the sea. His cheekbones, nose and jaw came together to make a flawless model’s face. His rational mind said that he should be happy, for he had everything he could ever want in terms of intelligence and good looks, and his parents were kind and loving. Still there was sadness inside those eyes. He couldn’t bring himself to tell his parents

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Challenge #00667 - A302: Slippery Slope

He who fights with monsters should be careful he doesn’t become a monster himself. Unless that makes him more effective at fighting monsters. Like he becomes a badass werewolf who knows how to use a sword and has magic armor. That’d be so rad.

My name… was… Vernon. A long time ago, now.

It began, as all beginnings must, with a quest to rescue a damsel in distress. Captured by vampires. Yes. She was held by monsters. And

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Overheard at the bar...

“All this time I just kinda assumed she had a couple loud, nosy roommates. She said the camera on her machine didn’t work, so that’s why she stuck to audio-only…”

“So why the post-date stress? Was she dog-ugly, and caught ya staring at her like she had two heads?”

“Three, actually. And not ugly, kinda cute, actually.”

“Pardon?”

“Imagine a bipedal Cerberus. With boobs. And about seven feet tall.”

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Challenge #00665 - A300: PDA PSA

“A peck on the cheek” means something completely different when dealing with avioids.

[AN: I now have 66 instant stories to go before I start working on the next anthology. Yay. Also I’ve been awake since Ofuck in the morning and my wrists are hurting and I’ve had an asthma attack and it’s not even dawn yet. My life is one huge roller coaster. Anyway - story time!]

Human habits were fascinating. And when

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Challenge #00664 - A299: Perilous Ornithology

The difference between a goose and a swan: A goose will chase at the drop of a hat and proceed to peck and bruise if it gets you. A swan will only attack if threatened, but can break bones.

“That’s ridiculous,” said a student in the middle of Allegedly Quiet Reading Time.

“Do you need assistance?” asked Mr Myss, Learning Advocate.

“This is an objectionable description of avians,” protested Yokk. “It assumes the

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Challenge #00663 - A298: Brawk?

T’reka meets a chicken

Her heart was already pounding as she scuttled from hiding place to hiding place in the human settlement. Their buildings were partially subterranean. Though some sat above the ground. Far above the ground. On a pole.

T’reka almost had a coronary when one of the residents of the strange little house said, “Cake?”

She remembered her breathing, and watched as her vital signs returned from red-lines. Only then, did she investigate.

“Cake… cake… sweet-sweet-sweet.”

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Challenge #00662 - A297: Bad Instincts

The most ridiculously evolved trait of a human: The itchiness of newly healed skin.

“This area is almost finished repairing. I now have the unbearable urge to claw at it.”

The human in the next bay was rubbing at her bandages. She was rubbing with her knuckles and grimacing.

“Most people use talon for scratch,” said Pu'rii, edging a little further away from the human. Well. As far as she could get on a not-so-spacious hospital bed.

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Challenge #00661 - A296: Strange Encounters

Pre-Amity, a human and other cogniscient get stuck in some relatively small space together, say a room that both find out the hard way only opens from the outside. Rescue is on its way, but until then…

They tell some pretty wild tales in Scavenger Bars. This is just one of them…

Hor'tik had been stripping wire. It had been a long trip already and it was that or mass credit. If he stayed out any longer, he’d have

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Not necessarily needing to go Night Vale on this one...

To truly understand, you must look inside yourself, look deep into your heart… no, no, you’re too far down, that’s your liver, try a bit more up and to the left… ah, there you go.

(#00660 - A295)

[An: But it’s so very very Night Vale…]

“Excuse me, but my species is not transparent.”

“You’re transparent to my eyes.”

“Eugh… Sorry. Uhm… We find our internals to be

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Challenge #00659 - A294: Warning - Humour

Breaking bones is a death sentence for other cogniscients, so how unlikely is it that anyone has encountered someone missing a digit or limb, unless they were born missing it?

Jokes using one’s prosthetics (probably more advanced in the group that lives long enough to need them) optional.

[AN: Some species are more fragile than others. Havenworlders are particularly delicate. And it’s notably the Birds for whom broken bones are fatal]

The cogniscent trapped with her in the stalled

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Challenge #00658 - A293: Politically Correct

“I wouldn’t say *we’ve* made that much progress. Our euphemisms have, though.”

“It’s ‘Avian Catastrophan’.”

“No, it’s simply Avian. Or Avian Citizen.”

“But some of them aren’t citizens. They still have resident status in Kal'rike.”

“Only because Kal'rike’s run by the most anal bureaucrats since time began…”

“Ladies,” said the Numidid of contention. “I am fine

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Challenge #00657 - A292: Fascinating in Retrospect

T’reka meets an amorous cassowary. Hilarity ensues.

Boo boo boo

T'reka looked up from her lunch to discover a giant in the clearing. Were it not for his solidly blue-black plumage, he could easily be mistaken for a male of her own species. But he was clearly more dinosaur than Bird.

The cranial capacity was a dead give-away.

He was puffing himself up. Engorging his wattle and showing off his plumage whilst saying, Boo boo boo.

Lonely she may be,

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Challenge #00656 - A291: Do You Have Time...?

The stars are right, R’yleh is about to rise…and Cthulhu’s Witnesses are out in force, ringing everyone’s doorbells.

Bing bonnnng

Sally peeked. People in suits with clipboards. On a Saturday. This was never good. She risked opening the door.

There was a dark-stained knife at his hip.

“Oh, don’t worry. It’s ceremonial,” smiled the clean-shaven man with the sunken eyes and a desperate smile. “Much like you’d wear

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Next Challanger

How does competitive combat (boxing, martial arts, etc.) fare in the new environment of the Amity universe?

(#00655 - A290)

The humans inside the roped-off square wore heavy padding on their hands, heads, and torsos. They faced off in formal postures that a number of them called Markisuvkwinsbree.

T'reka lit on Calico’s saddle and regarded the match.

“What this happening?”

Su-syn, leaning on her horse, chirped, “Testosterone-poisoning-related posturing. Two male here have rivalry over same female. They

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