InterNutter

Indie writer seeks audience with an audience. Paying customers welcome. [pronouns: ze/hir] Daily free stories happen because it is an excellent counter to Writers' Block.

Burpengary East http://www.cmweller.com 12650 posts

Challenge #00399 - A034: Creative Critiquing

An excellent “non-sequitur, thud”. 8.4, minus a 0.5 because you didn’t faceplant into the convenient messy food. 

When one has a real, live almost-human from Earth’s twentieth century as a resource, one can expect a certain amount of things. Revivals, for instance. Things got dredged up from the extensive lists of entertainment footage in possession of the Archivaas. T-shirts made a comeback when they really should have stayed away.

Disco came back from the dead.

And, thanks to Shayde, so did Vaudeville.

On the upside, he was earning quite a bit of his recordings of her reacting to things she watched and/or listened to. It never ceased to amaze Rael how people would fall over themselves to gain access to a recording of someone talking over a ‘movie’.

The downside was, in order to gain the profit, he had to spend time 'cozied up’ to Shayde.

Popcorn helped, but not enough.

This example was a series of skits with people pretending to be robots. The makeup was effective, as was the mime, and this one had some degree of technical difficulty, owing to the fact that it was shot inside a mansion that did not actually exist.

“I have a ques-tion,” said the designated ditz of the crew.

“And what would that be?” asked the straight man.

“Why is pea-nut but-ter?”

The straight man, naturally, malfunctioned and impacted a food-filled table, face first.

“Excellent non-sequiteur-thud,” said Shayde. “Eight point four. Minus point five fer missin’ the convenient, messy food.”

“To be fair, they would also miss out on two more hours’ of applying makeup,” Rael felt compelled to point out.

“Aye, there is that. This lot’re still low-budget. 'Studio time is valuable, darlin’.”

Great. Yet another reference he’d have to look up and annotate for the Archivaas. Not that it didn’t pay well, but… Just once, he’d like to have a conversation with her that didn’t involve research.

[Muse food remaining: 38. Submit a prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories!]

quinsecticide: Look what the humans of the manor have to put up with See, Rabbit? Hatchworth and Mayor McToilet know they did something...

quinsecticide:

Look what the humans of the manor have to put up with

See, Rabbit? Hatchworth and Mayor McToilet know they did something bad

Nobody knew how it happened. Not even Rabbit, who had had the wild flight of imagination to begin with.

Later inquiry revealed that Peter VI had left Steve in charge. Steve left Walter Girl Carolina in charge, who had then promoted Walter Girl Paige. She, in turn, left Michael Reed in charge. Michael noticed that he was the

Read more »

Challenge #00398 - A033: Come for the Spectacle...

Inspired by this: http://www.nbcchicago.com/news/weird/NATL-Mom-Eats-Monstrous-Steak-in-Under-3-Minutes–239490021.html

Competitive eating may have been a thing before humans or it may not have, but they certainly made it more interesting: It suddenly jumped three rating warnings, and became a spectator sport for those brave enough to watch.

The first interspecies restaurant had a glass-walled enclosure for the humans. Polarized glass walls. Those who did not wish to view human eating habits could purchase or rent shields for their

Read more »

bee-the-gatekeeper: Alright. One more. Tried to use the female Rabbit build for the outer portion of the design, not sure it worked out. I...

bee-the-gatekeeper:

Alright. One more. Tried to use the female Rabbit build for the outer portion of the design, not sure it worked out.

I shouldn’t stay up late… because as I created this Venice Carnival mask of Rabbit’s face (which was practically one already) I kept thinking how the Carnival there seemed less like a big fun party and more like a Comicon on LSD… It looks like the kind of party you’d invite your enemies to instead of

Read more »

Challenge #00397 - A032: Performance Peace

The much anticipated performance piece entitled, ‘Ask a Rude Question, Get an Honest Answer’

Naturally, it was a human who did it. The Galactic Congress, just getting used to the idea of humans as a recognised cogniscent and not a dangerous animal, attended in droves.

Even the common throng, who usually avoided ambassadorial exhibitions like the plague, attended.

Every performance was guaranteed to be unique, because every audience was a mixture of the curious and the vocal alike.

The artist sat in

Read more »

Challenge #00396 - A031: To Stop Human

After all those dramas and documentaries about how terrifying they were, you’d think somewhere it would have been mentioned how surprisingly ineffective stabbing was against humans.

(“multiple stab wounds” is a critical but in a lot of cases not actually immediately life threatening situation unless one hits a major blood vessel or one of the more important organs. Survivors with over 100 have happened a few times)

Taken from the Lectures of Koq'riix the Human Slayer:

They call

Read more »

Challenge #00395 - A030: Drunk Physics

“They’re arguing in the manner of inebriated scientists, which is to say semi-incoherently, passionately, and with citations.”

“Na, na, na, na… ‘E wasnae sayin’ tha’ black holes don’t exist… 'E was sayin’ th’ math w’s easier if'n they didn’t.”

“But that’s… that’s… that’s… thassnot the quote pipple use…”

“Aye, an&

Read more »

If you're a writer and you see this post, stop what you're doing.

mark-helsing:

WHENEVER YOU SEE THIS POST ON YOUR DASH, STOP WHAT YOU’RE DOING AND WRITE ONE SENTENCE FOR YOUR CURRENT PROJECT.

Just one sentence. Stop blogging for one minute and write a single sentence. It could be dialogue, it could be a nice description of scenery, it could be a metaphor, I don’t care. The point is, do it. Then, when you finish, you can get back to blogging.

If this gets viral, you might just have your novel finished

Read more »

...

bee-the-gatekeeper:

bunjywunjy:

sharoontheraccoontyphoon:

ddoki:

therivanqueen:

trixter-jake-english:

gliber-t:

gaylienz:

redandblackbicycle:

Found this via reddit

finally something that treats introverts and extroverts as equals

The punctuation is even accurate holy shit

Freaking thank you. Being shy and being an introvert are not the same thing, as well as being obnoxious and being an extrovert.

my fifth grade teacher once told my parents in a report that i was “comma happy”

i’m shy , hades yeah i use dots a lot

Ah, obnoxious. I prefer

Read more »

Challenge #00394 - A029: It Came From Planet Earth

*totally wasn’t rereading old daily stories for art ideas, nope not me*

You’ve got a few titles for the horror movies, books, tv shows and assorted media starring humans before proper first contact was made scattered in the daily drabbles, may we see one?

[AN: Of course I’m not going to write the whole thing]

They thought they were safe inside the base. But then, they thought that sprinkling their crops with capsaicin would stop the

Read more »