InterNutter

Indie writer seeks audience with an audience. Paying customers welcome. [pronouns: ze/hir] Daily free stories happen because it is an excellent counter to Writers' Block.

Burpengary East http://www.cmweller.com 12173 posts

Challenge #00934-B203: Loverly Spam...

You don’t reference Monty Python to be helpful, you reference Monty Python because you can.

On the upside, they now had an interstellar ‘ride‘. On the downside, it was an abandoned freighter. Its hold was still full. Which meant that the parental company had pulled the plug and evacuated the pilot when the cargo proved to be valueless.

And, of course, Shayde had to look.

“No,” she grinned. The tone of her voice made it sound like a good thing.

Which meant that it was supremely bad news for Rael. “What have you found?” he grated in the disinterested tones of someone who knew he didn’t want to know, but also wanted the painful bit over as soon as humanly possible.

“Jus’ look,” she said in the tones of someone who had just discovered Christmas.

He did. The cargo holds, all fifty of them, were chock full of stasis pallets loaded and stacked high with blue cans featuring something… pink.

“I don’t get it,” he confessed. He toured down into the hold for a closer look. It was some variety of canned meat product. Ancient Terran alphabet. The yellow letters declared it to be SPAM.

Shayde’s voice pitched up into an unholy screech, “We got Eggs, Spam and Chips… Spam, Eggs and Sausage… Eggs, Spam, Sausage and Chips… Spam, Eggs, Spam and Spam… Spam, Sausage, Spam, Eggs and Spam… Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam and Spam…”

Her usual field of ur-reality asserted itself in an invisible chorus of male voices singing, “Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam…”

“Would you stop that?” pleaded Rael.

“Right on cue!” Shayde crowed. She slid down the railing so she could mime punching him in the arm. “And you said ye had no idea of what Monty Python was.”

“I still don’t,” Rael muttered. “Is this a food product or a punchline?”

“Ye know,” said Shayde. “I often wondered tha’ meself…”

[Muse food remaining: 12. Submit a prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories!]

daedric-reject: EVERY 'STEAM POWERED GIRAFFE' FAN OUT THERE, LISTEN UP! Want to see Steam Powered Giraffe in Rock Band 4? If you didn't...

daedric-reject:

EVERY ‘STEAM POWERED GIRAFFE’ FAN OUT THERE, LISTEN UP!

Want to see Steam Powered Giraffe in Rock Band 4? If you didn’t know, Harmonix is taking song requests for the newest Rock Band. With enough votes we could get a song in.

Here’s what you do:

  1. Go to this website

  2. Enter the song I’ll Rust With You(if we all vote for the same song it should increase the chances of it getting in)

  3. Press submit

Reblog this

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moonkistprincess: Student & Independent BeautyJust some of the independent or student animations that I never would have seen if not...

moonkistprincess:

Student & Independent Beauty
Just some of the independent or student animations that I never would have seen if not for Tumblr.

Crayon Dragon | Ghost | High Tide | In-Between | The Cat Piano

Out of respect for the artists, please do not remove this caption.

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Challenge #00933-B202: It's Just Physics

“Oh, so attempting to mind control the entire planet is fine, but steam engines, now THEY’RE too much…”

“Steam powered machines just wouldn’t work in space,” argued Ken. “It’s just physics. You wouldn’t need a fire, the water would just boil from lack of pressure. And don’t get me started on how the cabin pressure works.”

Kyle sighed. “It’s not supposed to be taken seriously.”

“Yes, but science that bad manages to filter into the heads

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12. Commander Cosmo

officialsteampoweredgiraffe:

Track List Reveal for Steam Powered Giraffe: The Vice Quadrant: A Space Opera

Track #12 - Commander Cosmo
Written by Isabella Bunny Bennett

“Flying saucers, sky sharks, the Starblood Beast™
all could not compare
Even the space pterodactyls didn’t stand a chance,
Commander Cosmo killed them all with his Sun Beam Stare™”

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How to Flag Images as Inappropriate on Google Images

rogue-of-time-out:

For those of you who are concerned that gross people might make a certain children’s show unsafe for kids.

Step 1: Search the name of a show or character and find a concerning image under safe search.

image

Step 2: Find a concerning image and hit Send feedback.

image

(I’m not actually gonna report this image. It just takes a lot of scrolling in this search to find a concerning image so good job there.)

Step 3: Describe and then Highlight

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Things They Don't Teach You in School

kushandwizdom:

mightymaple:

bytdwd:

nico-incognito:

tastelessfashion:

wanderinglezyogi:

bobbsayshi:

Lincoln believed white people were the superior race

“Lincoln initially recognized that slavery was a bad institution but one that was accepted and necessary for the South’s economy. In Bloomington, Illinois, he stated “that southern slaveholders were neither better, nor worse than we of the north, and that we of the north were no better than they. And we never ought to lose sight of this fact in discussing the subject.” Additionally, he appeared

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4mysquad: Ralkina Jones tells police at station: 'I don't want to die in your cell' - video In video released by Cleveland Heights...

4mysquad:

Ralkina Jones tells police at station: ‘I don’t want to die in your cell’ – video

In video released by Cleveland Heights police, Ralkina Jones tells an officer 

‘I don’t want to die in your cell’ 

about 15 hours before she is found dead at the station. Jones is seen in the bodycam footage, shot on 25 July, a day after her arrest, asking about her cell and telling police she needs to take medicine for various medical conditions. Jones

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sketchypandagames: underwaterlookingupatyou: sketchypandagames: Revised concept art for Sylvia, Doris, Peggy, and Betty. I've posted...

sketchypandagames:

underwaterlookingupatyou:

sketchypandagames:

Revised concept art for Sylvia, Doris, Peggy, and Betty. I’ve posted these separately, but never as a set. Peggy and Betty’s new 3D models have been finished, while Doris and Sylvia’s are still in process. Art by imagineamanda

I’m torn, I like Peggy better in a dress, but I like that there is someone rocking pants.

That’s exactly what I thought when I saw it, but we felt it was worth giving it a

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Challenge #00932-B201: We Are Magic

Person #1: C'mon!

Person #2: No.

Person #1: Aww. Please?

Person #2: No. There’s no such thing.

Person #1: But you’ll never know if you have magic powers until you try!

Person #2: sigh Fine. Abracada-[Words in a dead tongue, strange lights from nowhere and levitating off the floor]

What Debbie and Angela didn’t know, of course, was that it was all a trick. A light show, mostly. And her limited skills in telekinesis for the levitating objects.

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