so for some reason hershey’s thinks that golden apples would be great to sell as valentine’s candy
so i got one and wrote this on top:
and left it on a table in the studio
less than five minutes later people were fighting about it
my plan has thus far been a success
you are a perfect person
Classic. Literally :)
(#00020)
“I’m goin’,”
“Yes I’m goin’,”
“I’m. Going to the.”
“Goin’ yes I’m goin’ to the –”
“HARDWARE STOOOOOORRRREEE!”
“ELF!”
“It wasn’t *just* me, mein herr…”
“What’s wrong with the classics?” asked Kitty.
“I like that song,” said one of the Jamies. He’d been half
Read more »Very much NSFW fic continued from yesterday:
Fracture Twenty-Nine: Adventures
Bluebelle was getting bored. Oma, Opa and the rest of the family had had to go home. All the crying in the world couldn’t make them stay, not that she hadn’t tried. She’d cried so hard she’d made herself ill for a whole day.
Doctor Hank gave her a yucky drink so her head wouldn’t hurt, but he also gave her hugs,
Read more »(#00019)
It was a dark and -o god- stormy night. The bums that usually cleared out five minutes before the little tip saucer appeared on their table hung around and actually dropped change on the saucer.
Pennies, for the most part. The occasional nickel, crying because it was alone. And one ancient-looking coin and a string of cowrie shells.
Aisha freshened up the weirdo’s coffee and said, “We prefer legal tender, here.” The coin was surprisingly heavy and
Read more »Very much NSFW fic continued from yesterday:
Fracture Twenty-Eight: Confessions
“Ach! This is turning into a soap opera…” said Papa.
“I can understand the confusion,” Kurt grinned a little. “The *how* I found out is even more confusing than the *what* I found out.” He gave Kitty a squeeze, and smiled when he didn’t instantly find a bone. She was starting to fill out at long last. Kurt surrendered to temptation and sampled
Read more »(#00017)
There are ten thousand dirty stories in this city. I’m just one of them. My name is Miki Spelaine. I’m a cop. And in case you missed the magnificent boobs and the ass made of sass, I’m also a girl.
Treat me right, I’m a lady. Do me wrong… well, you better not do me wrong.
This job is littered with divorces and broken relationships. Being a cop eats love and spits
Read more »Read more »Warren Buffett, in a recent interview with CNBC, offers one of the best quotes about the debt ceiling:
“I could end the deficit in 5 minutes,” he told CNBC. “You just pass a law that says that anytime there is a deficit of more than 3% of GDP, all sitting members of Congress are ineligible for re-election.
The 26th amendment (granting the right to vote for 18 year-olds) took only 3 months & 8 days to be ratified! Why? Simple! The people
Very Much NSFW fic continued from yesterday:
Fracture Twenty-Seven: Making Friends
“When’ll you come back?”
“Well, if I can stay out of detention, around four.”
“But that’s for*ever*…”
Daddy dropped into a crouch. “It’s okay, liebe. You still have all the grown-ups to talk to.”
Bluebelle whimpered. “But you’ll be *gone*,” she protested. “You mightn’t come back.”
“
Read more »(#00016)
Shayde winced as she filtered the young lizard girl’s enthusiastic babbling through her own understanding.
Yikes.
This kid had the worst case of wishful listening Shayde had ever seen.
“Danny…”
“Maybe I can take you to see the storm aurora. It only happens outside the left tail section for some reason? Oh! Wait. There’s like a historical theatre thing? Sometimes they do recreation shows, sometimes they show the old-style cinema stuff? It’
Read more »Very much NSFW fic continued from yesterday:
Fracture Twenty-Six: Faces of Fear
The pre-trial had demanded that only the survivors come to court. There were still people standing in the aisles, and crowding the rails of the upper gallery.
They all stared at Hess.
Lengthy research revealed that Hess was her true name. She used it, on and off, at various places where no-one had heard of her. She had a dozen other identities, at least. Both her nomadic nature and her
Read more »No, it isn’t what you think.
It’s because I’m a massive word nerd. I know that sticking “trans” in front of “misogyny” only covers an approximate half of the trans* community. It specifically calls on hatred of transgals only.
There is no “transmisandry” popping up anywhere. Either the transguys out there are better at transitioning, or it isn’t an issue [Like hell, it isn’t an issue;
Read more »“Sophia Pirelli was everything a girl like me could hope for: tall, beautiful, intelligent, editor of the college paper, a tall redhead with legs that went on for miles. I’d crushed on her for months, finally working up the gumption to ask her for coffee. She was perfect. She was glorious. And yet we had nothing to talk about.”
AKA the most awkward date ever/what happens when crushes and reality collide violently.
“Yes, my foster parents
Read more »Very much NSFW fic continued from yesterday:
Fracture Twenty-Five: Survivors
Hess had been attacking children for fifteen years. Apparently, Kurt was somewhere in the middle.
“Gruss Gott…”
Bluebelle clung to him like a limpet, half-hiding from all the strangers. She, Kitty and Kurt all wore a little tag that marked them as survivors.
There were lots of tags in the crowd.
“I guess it *is* a convention,” said Kitty. “Look, there’s even booths.”
Read more »(#00015)
[It’s Free to a Loving Home, BTW…]
“Remind me again why we’re doing this?”
“It’s this or orange jumpsuits, yo.” Todd twiddled with the device around his neck. Stark Industries had been both very quick and very clever with coming up with ways to ensure mutant miscreants paid their dues.
“Stop doing that,” warned Freddy. “You might make it angry.” He had discovered the downside of
Read more »Very much NSFW fic continued from yesterday:
Fracture Twenty-Four: Chain Reaction
Coffee dripped off of Principal Kelly’s TV screen.
“Oh, *GOD*, no!” He knelt in front of it, where his newly-hired Gym teacher’s face was being broadcast, nationwide, under the lable of 'child abuser’. And she’d seemed so *nice*… So - *normal*. “I'm *ruined*! *Ruined*! God, why does this have to happen to meeeee… I'm not a bad man…
Read more »
