Submission

A 900-post collection

Challenge #00460 - A085: Like Humans Do

In terms of romance, compared to humans, all other sentient species are incredibly awkward, stumbling over words, blurting nonsensical sentences, accidentally changing colour, releasing/commenting on pheromones, and/or bluntly stating their piece in a deadpan manner.

Conversely, compared to everyone else the most nervous and awkward of humans is a veritable poet.

She had been trying to speak to the idol of her heart for a Standard Month, now. They came to the same places at that she did. Showed evident likes of similar things.

And was beautiful beyond measure.

And every day, every time. All she could manage was limp, lacklustre things like, “Hi,” or “Cool,” or “How’s it been?” She knew, now, why they called it small talk. Small words. Inconsequential. Ineffective. Invisible.

And she knew the human couldn’t possibly pick up on her own mating displays. They just didn’t register.

Meanwhile, humans everywhere were diving headlong into cross-species relationships with the grace and style known to no other kind.

It took her that entire month to work out what to say. All day to work up the courage to say it. And even then, she stumbled.

“Yah-you make my higher synapses misfire and I want more. Are you ameh..(gulp) amenable?”

The human smiled and changed colour. “Well aren’t you smooth as fuck?”

“K… Kerrit. Is my name. My name is Kerrit.”

A laugh. “You can breathe, Kerrit. I’m Dani. And I am very pleased to become your acquaintance.”

How did they do it?

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Love will find a way...

It’s a pity that things like true love and soulmates and finding that special someone aren’t more obvious in their identification and verifying - would be so much easier if there were a special personal sort of dim glow or subtle sound or faint scent or somesuch to point out the one we’re destined to be with the rest of our lives. Far less troublesome or confusing than all this dragging-on about dating and courtship and

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Challenge #00457 - A082: San Check

If you meet Yog-Sothoth, you’ve gone too far on the axis of comprehension; back up slowly and call for reality assistance. – RecklessPrudence

Ow. It had happened again. OW! It wasn’t getting any better with experience.

Katie looked up from her pained huddle, halfway expecting somebody yelling at her to ‘avaunt’ and calling her names. One more time. One more time, she swore, and she would start calling herself a foul shayde from out the blackest

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Challenge #00457 - A082: Beautiful Hostile

http://cnvvj.tumblr.com/post/76196333269/sharped0-gobigorgoextinct-steve-irwin-in-a

That is all.

[AN: Out of respect for the Irwin family, I’m making a very Steve-like character]

“Damn crazy Australians,” muttered Pentecost.

The team for Beautiful Hostile had arrived. Jaeger, pilot and… co-pilot. If such a term could be used for a crocodile that Harry Banks sort of kept as a pet.

That was part of the winning strategy for Beautiful Hostile. It beat the Kaiju by literally fighting like

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Challenge #00454 - A079: This Always Happens...

“I leave you guys for ten seconds and you all become rabbits? Why does this happen to almost everyone I know?”

“Uhm,” said Twyll. Who currently resembled a tortie lop.“We’re… not… rabbits.”

“Twyll… when’d you become a liar?” he asked, confused. “You’re like Little Miss Truth…”

“Jor…” said the angry-looking white bunny with amazing eyeliner game. That had

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Both as in categorically both (SPG fics) and (Koq'riix), not those two SPG drabbles in particular. English grammar is a butt on the...

Both as in categorically both (SPG fics) and (Koq’riix), not those two SPG drabbles in particular. English grammar is a butt on the internet with no emphasis. And it doesn’t help that I went on a tangent. Mayor McToilet did indeed produce giggles. Much needed giggles after the heart-stomping from the first drabble you evil evil author.

English is indeed a butt. And I shall laugh maniacally at being called evil.

MWU-HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA….

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Challenge #00453 - A078: Humanity in a Nutshell

Has there ever been an instrument more representative of humanity than the Zeusaphone? (I highly recommend checking out their Youtube page) – RecklessPrudence

“So… the Terran Exhibition.”

“Yeah, it’s docking next week. Should help defuse Silly Season for another month.”

‘Are you going?“

"Only with adequate shielding. I heard they have the Lightning Meisters playing with this circuit.”

“Lightning… I don’t think I’ve heard of

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Challenge #00450-451 - A075-76: Whuffo/The Inauguration of Mayor McToilet

(Can I do this? I’m doing it anyway.)

Free day! If there’s a drabble you’ve been wanting to write but haven’t had the right prompt to do it, now’s the time.

[AN: I don’t know when I’m going to get one of these again, so I’m going for broke. Be warned: the first one included feels inspired by this post. The second one is just a

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Challenge #00449 - A074: The Nose Compass

(Actually said by a friend today)

“I have absolutely no idea what it smells like… But it smells like food”

Amalgam Station masses roughly the same as a Dwarf Planet, but is much, much larger in size because Dwarf Planets do not, for instance, contain corridors, cavernous spaces, parks, amenities, and infrastructure.

People tend to forget this. What they know of Amalgam Station becomes the sole total of their experience and they wander no further than their own knowledge.

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Challenge #00448 - A073: Personal Assessment

The Lister is the SI unit of discipline, as defined by the amount of effort needed to make Third Technician David Lister do his duties, clean his quarters and generally not be such a shame to the Space Corps. A single Lister of discipline is therefore often more than is needed for the entire crew of a (Star Wars) Star Destroyer (47,000-odd). – RecklessPrudence

It was hard not to look down on the faceless drones. They weren’t literally faceless.

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Complaining to another supernatural being.

“You also rule a world, Morpheus. A world of sleepers and dreamers, of stories. A simple place compared to hell. I envy you. Can you imagine what it was like? Ten billion years providing a place for dead mortals to torture themselves? And like all masochists, they called the shots. ‘Burn me.’ 'Freeze me.’ 'Eat me.’ 'Hurt me.’ And we did. Why do they blame me for all their little failings? They use my name as

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Challenge #00446 - A071: Whoops

Supervisor: Seriously? Are you shitting me?
Computer Tech: I never intentionally released anything into the wild. It was proof of concept. It wasn’t anything particularly sophisticated. Just some script kiddie cut and paste bullshit.
S: What is Rule Number Two of Computer Repair? What is it?
CT: “No, a ‘virus’ didn’t download all of that porn.”
S: Are you telling me you invalidated Rule Number Two?
CT: Well, in my case, it was a

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Challenge #00445 - A070: A Little More Complicated

Rule Number One of Computer Repair: Reboot it, dumbarse.

Rule One-A: If rebooting fixed the problem and it doesn’t come back, you didn’t really have a problem.

Rule One-B: If I actually had to tell you to reboot, regardless of whether you had a real problem or not, I’m still charging you for my time. – RecklessPrudence

“…error… error… error…”

Scientists clustered around the tic'ing automaton in clear defiance of

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Answering this now because it's more of a question than a prompt

So the Amalgam verse has those fan-pins for insulters, and you mentioned somewhere that there was a three-badge scale from something like occasional-accidental-insult to has-no-idea-what-social-mores-are-please-educate. What’s the fan level for will-insult-your-entire-family-when-annoyed or the reaction to precisely and deliberately reducing someone to a puddle of crying goo with a few well placed verbal barbs?

The fan pin is for people who are insulting by accident. Most people of the level you describe go pro or are selected for special training by

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Challenge #00444 - A069: The Test

SPG in the far-future of your own universe.  Because robots + space. – Weirdlet

Rael was ostensibly taking Shayde on a tour of the station’s Ambassadorial Meeting Chamber. What he was covertly doing was testing her. If she really was who she said she had been. If she really had existed on Earth at the time she stated… she would be able to recognise Them.

The Consortium of Steam.

The only artificial intelligences who had been thrown out of the

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