Who’s the blacksmith out there moulding titty armour to every strong female character more accurately than a fitter at Victoria Secret?
Tis I Mandick the titty smithy -- Anon Guest
[AN: Titty armour is very silly and not entirely practical and does NOT include the wads of padding that do the heavy lifting of saving the wearer's life. But that does not look sexy on screen. Bleh]
"Impenetrable Armour of Vacuum-Sealed Fit," read Avello the Valiant. "Women only." The sample in the window had a buxom dummy with the aforementioned armour clinging literally skin tight to every detail it had to offer. "Additional free Gambeson of Vacuum-Sealed Fit with every purchase."
Squire Val was staring. "Everyone could see your aureola in that." After a moment's thought, she added, "Everyone could see where you have moles."
"The impenetrable part, I can understand," said Avello. "I'd want that. The vacuum-sealed? Gross. I don't want random people seeing some of my scars... Or my aureolas."