A 7-post collection

Challenge #00889-B158: Nonse



With the amount of sense the last few hours have not made, I’m tempted to believe that this is all a simulation someone or something built into the universe for people foolish enough to have attempted what I did…

[AN: I am having intense internet trouble at the mome so I’m giving this to you from my phone. Forgive the lack of the usual formatting]

The trees were gathering water and farming people.

This… this was wrong. The sky was the colour of earth and the earth itself was blue. And… slightly marshy? But it was dry. A dry and supple sponge that nevertheless conspired to squelch.

A triffid on its leash was hissing at her. It looked exactly like the ridiculous rubber monsters of the movie. She guarded her eyes, just in case, and stumbled onwards down the soggy road.

One tree-child, naked as a jay, ran screaming from her. Yelling what sounded like, “Groot! Groot!” to the others.

She was out of range of the hissing triffid, at least. Shayde looked the lead tree squarely in its… face? and carefully, slowly, assumed a position of surrender.

Fingers interlaced and hands on top of her head. Kneeling in the squishy ground with her ankles crossed. And, because she was two heartbeats away from messing what was left of her clothes, Shayde did the one thing that always helped her calm down.

She sang.

“Picture yourself on a boat on a river… with tangerine trees and marmalade skies… Somebody calls you, you answer quite slowly. A girl with kaleidoscope eyes…”

She peeked. Okay. This was good. They weren’t exactly aiming their weapons at her. But they were approaching with caution.

This was not the time to grin and show her sharp teeth. This was a time for staying very still and not doing anything at all threatening.

“Fimbalism finger fink,” the leader demanded. “Krelborn groot lalama!”

“Rapacious radishes,” she replied, and almost kicked herself. “Look. You cannae understand me. I cannae understand you. Mebbe a wee bit o’ pantomime?”

“Sconculous! Erid flelow carnarvon?”

Shayde sighed. This was going to be a long day. “Would ye believe, I’m mostly harmless?”

[Muse food remaining: 18. Submit a prompt! Ask a question! Buy my stories!]

Challenge #00849-B118: Tough Crowd



A species that has a language where musical vocables (La, de, dum, da etc.) are all either swearwords or very rude.

“I d-d-d-d-don’t know what happ-p-p-ened,” complained Rabbit.

“We were going so well,” said The Spine. “It doesn’t compute… it doesn’t compute…”

“…i don’t want to be mus-ic-ians an-y-more…” sulked Hatchworth.

Pete 17, urgently directing repair teams of Walter Workers, took a deep breath. “What the

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Challenge #00582 - A207: Visiting an Ailing Friend

Challenge #00582 - A207: Visiting an Ailing Friend



Hatchworth and Fluttershy in the world of SPG

[AN: I almost tossed this and then I realised it was a different prompt]

Hatchworth was certainly an interesting friend. He spoke of interesting things, of humans and dragons and an assortment of interesting beings in a place called Kazooland.

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Sloe gin fizzes were like a grown-up version of a milkshake - sweet and creamy and too easy to overindulge on. Much to her dismay the next...




It wasn’t the usual “one tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor” kind of headache. Those could usually be dealt with by a Tums, a Tylenol, and two bottles of gatorade.

This was knives-in-the-head painful.

Euw. Her entire left side was sticky.

And she was lying on a lot of sharpish, hard, painful objects.

Did she fall asleep in a Lego bin again?

She risked opening an eye.

An abominably cheerful metal face was staring back at her. It

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reblog with a celebrity you share a birthday with










Christopher Lee and Vincent Price

y’all can sit down now

hp lovecraft, james marsters, misha collins :>

Ooo… Paul Simon and Sacha Baron Cohen… not bad. Not Vincent Price, but still.

TS Eliot (hell yeah cats) Serena Williams and Olivia Newton John.

I dunno, having the guy who penned the poems that were the basis for the CATS musical is pretty rad.

i share a bday w/ psy

Oprah Winfrey!

Erik Estrada.

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