Critics review of The Mikado, performed by St Trinians School for Young Ladies. -- Anon Guest
The papers flew in, and for once, the girls did not blow up the paperboy. They'd been waiting for these particular editions with bated breath. They were the ones with the reviews in them. The girls wanted to read about the raving.
The dozen or so in the cast thundered down the stairs to their school song, "Maidens of Saint Trinians, gird your armour on/ Grab the ne-arest weapon, never mind which one/ The battle's to the strongest, might is always right/ Trample on the weakest, glory in their plight!" The girls who were awake and not currently nursing a hangover joined in for the chorus. And then fell into silence for the rest of it, "Stride towards your fortune, boldly on your way/ Never once forgetting there's one born ev'ry day/ Let our motto be broadcast, 'get your blow in first'/ She who draws the sword last always comes off worst!"
By the end of the second chorus, they had retrieved the papers and undiplomatically divided them by a brief round of Stab Dodge Grapple. And the victors took plinth positions as they paged through to the reviews.
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