Challenge #04001-J349: Weirdest Roommate Ever

A: So I’ve got a spider in my apartment…

B: Spiders are actually good, just leave them alone.

A: Wait, really?

B: Yeah, they eat other pest, so it’s better to keep them around.

6-feet spider: I αɱ αʅʅ ƚԋαƚ ʂƚαɳԃʂ Ⴆҽƚɯҽҽɳ ყσυ αɳԃ ɾσαƈԋҽʂ Jσʂҽρԋ. Yσυ ƈԋσʂҽɳ ɯιʂҽʅყ ƚσ υρԋσʅԃ συɾ αʅʅιαɳƈҽ, ɱყ ϝɾιҽɳԃ.

If you can't read the glitch texts it said "I am all that stand between you and the roaches Joseph. You have chosen wisely to uphold our alliance my friend." -- Anon Guest

[AN: I'm not doing glitch font for the story. I may go as far as using mild L337, but that's it.]

"He's pretty big and his name's Harold," said Joseph. "It was a joke on 'hairy spider' but.... uhm. He kind of asked for more formality?"

"I think you mean 'she' if it's a large spider. The females are generally larger than th--" Bea startled out of her attempted infodumping. "Wait. What?"

"Harold's really big. And smarter than the average arachnid. I think," said Joseph. "I haven't exactly spoken to a lot of arachnids. Can they speak?" He had spent his formative years in a far more pristine household. Acclimating to life in the wider world was an ongoing process.

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