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Shayde

A 68-post collection

Challenge #01694-D233: They Aren't the Champions

Something nice about all those who will never be champions but compete and play sport, and love it. -- Anon Guest

They say, do what you love, and you will never need to work again. This only really works if one is good at the thing one loves. There are people, out there, who are absolute pants at the thing they love. But they do it anyway, because love is, as the song says, strange.

Case in point, the Arse End Football Club. Named by the instigator and chief pants-level player, Ambassador Shayde, of course. It's allegedly named after the location of the playing field, near the dry docks' end of the station, which also resembles the tail end of a fish if one squints correctly. But most who have joined realise and recognise that it's also named for their playing ability. But none of that matters.

Because it's something they love.

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Challenge #01691-D230: Dangerous Lifeforms

[Name] wondered if considering that statement to be a fine example of famous last words made them unduly paranoid or just conscious of historical precedent. -- RecklessPrudence

There are numerous, common, famous last words. "I think it's going to be all right," is in the top ten. Likewise, "Hold my beer, I've got this," or, "Hey, watch this!" But of the all-time destined-to-be-last-words, Grax thought that, "Awright, silleh bugurz..." had to be a record-holder for the first prize.

Especially when it came

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Challenge #01680-D219: Rockit Launch 'n' BBQ

Actual thing said over the ruins of a test engine that had found a new fuel mix too spicy for it: "Whall, rocket fuel is kinda like a chain saw. If it warn't dangerous, it wouldn't be very useful." -- RecklessPrudence

People make assumptions. That much was natural. You see the way someone dresses. You hear the way they speak. You assume things about the rest of them. Most of those things are wrong. Katie Walker had learned this and used it

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Challenge #01676-D215: Starter Fuel

The morning cup of coffee, the snack brought from the little shop nearby, whatever gets you going in the morning. -- Anon Guest

It was a booth called, Eat Drink Good Morning and there was one strategically placed in all the tram stops near residential areas. According to the advertising on its exterior, it boasted "everything you need to start your day".

Shayde decided to put that to the test. Besides, she'd had a horrible night and needed her variety of pick-me-up.

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Challenge #01670-D209: Incident at the Old Mating Grounds

Lizards attract mates differently, no flowers etc. So, how do the Amalgam lizards court? One of the local species here climbs to a prominent spot, poses and nods. -- Anon Guest

They called it Crestflare Bridge, and it had an unparallelled view of the Free Table Vendor area below. Tradition held that the tables would never have shaded covers. Because the females of assorted lizard species liked looking on the displaying males as they cruised between vendors.

Even now, centuries after the

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Challenge #01663-D202: Conceptual Difficulties

Defying the Gods is an age-old tradition. How well it WORKS depends on who's telling it... -- RecklessPrudence

"We're having difficulty understanding this," said Sherlock.

"I sympathise," said Rael. "I'm having difficulty understanding it myself, and I was there to witness it."

"We have the footage and the audio, of course," Sherlock played it on one of his multiple screens. "She had a permit for incense and steam[1]. What was she doing with them?"

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Challenge #01643-D182: High-level Negotiations

Do you ever get the feeling that (God/the Gods) (has/have) a plan? And you're the only one who can stop it? -- RecklessPrudence

Of all the forces of the multiverse, none is more terrifying than a being with the Gods on their side. They are unstoppable, indomitable, and irrevocable. And of all the beings in the multiverse, none are more pitiable than the ones the Gods merely use as a tool.

And when one comes against the other...

Shayde faced

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Challenge #01630-D169: Can't Eat Just One

It is so hard to eat just one peanut or popcorn. -- Anon Guest

The humans had a word for it. They had a word for lots of things. This one was 'more-ish'. As opposed to 'moorish', which meant 'a human with darker skin, usually originating from a specific area of the largest continent in the northern hemisphere', this one meant that the person eating the thing found it so tasty that they wanted... more.

One such food, easily digested even by

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Challenge #01628-D167: Honey Trap

When stepping into a Gods domain, enter as the supplicant or as something greater than a God. Never as a conqueror, Gods take a deep and personal delight in casting down challenges to their authority. -- RecklessPrudence

We apologise for the inconvenience, said the words in her head. We must quarantine you from reality as you know it.

After ten years of bouncing from reality to reality, the being who called herself Shayde had to wonder what these superior powers were up

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Challenge #01611-D150: Two Birds

"HOW?"

"You know, I learned a long time ago that if you say that in any matter relating to [Person], if you even get an answer it will probably lead to more questions." -- RecklessPrudence

They used to say, "if a problem's big enough, the Glunk will take care of it" on Amalgam Station. As a hostile biohazard, it was unique in the known universe. For a start, it was the only known biohazard in civilisation that counted as its own district.

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Challenge #01603-D142: Eat Snax

"Fat grubs in butter sauce." this was from a Lizard culture's idea of Snack Food. Humans have popcorn, crisps, peanuts etc. So how about one of those Snack Food van equivalents that caters to various species, and make a good living thereby. -- Knitnan

Eat Snax the sign blared in potentially noxious colours. Underneath, a more staid sign discreetly told the observant that this was a suggestion and not an order. Inside the ludicrously small booth, a popcorn popper was doing its

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Challenge #01597-D136: T's and Switch

It is not really rocket science unless there has been at least one unplanned explosion. (Alt version) It is not really rocket science unless there has been at least one rapid unscheduled disassembly. -- RecklessPrudence

Katie could easily learn to hate the summer monthly T-Shirt Days. Hackmeyer kept ogling her boobs. Well. Where something boob-like was still forming. She was fifteen, and the last time she'd been forced to go along with T-Shirt Day, she wore her age with the subtitle, Don't

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Challenge #01593-D132: Understanding on the Brink of a Fall

"The stars died so that you could be here today." —Lawrence M. Krauss -- RecklessPrudence

Shayde found Ambassador Gunther on one of the uppermost balconies of the Elemeno, looking down at the bottom in a way she knew too well. There was a time when the word "Jump!" was a cruel joke, and a time when it would be taken as a serious suggestion. This was one of the latter cases.

Much though she'd love to see all the Greater Deregulations and

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Challenge #01592-D131: Takes Me WABAC

“The universe is change; life is your perception of it.” — Marcus Aurelius -- RecklessPrudence

What alarmed Rael the most about Ambassador Shayde was how quickly she adapted to the latest in technology. Only B'Nari tech confounded her, but then, it confounded everyone but the B'Nari, who were made to merge with it. Shayde had the annoying habit of treating anything knew as if it should have existed some years prior to its actual invention.

When given something from her own past, it

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Challenge #01590-D129: Concerned Citizens

This is like watching a train-wreck and the 1812 Overture happening simultaneously. -- RecklessPrudence

The Good Gastronomy Association had been trying to ban Unsuitable Food for decades. They protested that too many people were indulging too often in imbalanced, improper, and unscientific nutrition. The people opposing them protested that that was kind of the point. While it was possible to live forever on Nutri-Food, with all its variations in taste, flavour, and presentation, it was also a very dull life.

There is

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