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Realm of the InterNutter

Thoughts, stories and ideas.

Challenge #01393-C298: Meeting of the Lost

Alphas have the charisma and make the most noise, but it's the Betas, and Gammas who do the most work. -- Knitnan

[AN: Alpha theory is a relic of Victorian thinking and all that 'might makes right', 'survival of the fittest', strength==power bullshit. The creatures we think of as 'Alphas' actually wind up winning the least female attention and losing out in the genetic lottery. I'm a writer, I research this stuff for fun]

He thought he had found some of his fellows. More mild-mannered men who were generally too shy to make themselves known to the one they pined for. Daryl could understand words like 'friendzone'. He was permanently the friend. Never the boyfriend.

But this meeting... this meeting had something very wrong with it.

"It's all these Alphas," complained a fellow in a shirt that had not been washed since a prior decade. "Parading around with their big muscles and hot cars. They always impress the females by beating up on nice guys like us."

The murmur of agreement went around the majority of the room. Daryl was one of the ones who remained silent.

"The females never care about nice guys. They don't want someone who loves them, who'll cherish them. They want what they can get. Diamonds, fast cars, muscly arm candy. The system is rigged against us."

"Alphas suck."

"Wait," said Daryl. "What are alphas?"

The leader of the meeting sneered through his greasy, unkempt beard. "They're the scum of humanity. Brainless morons with muscle and money and little else. Dumb jocks who live to see guys like us dragged through the mud. They're loud, annoying, assholes with nothing but money and meat to offer. By the time the females realise their mistake, it's too late. They're fat and ugly and he's dumped her for a newer model."

"Stupid bitches," grumbled another member. "They don't even know what's missing."

"Er," said Daryl. "Have any of you really studied nature? The ones we thought of as Alphas don't actually do much of the mating. They miss out because they offend the females, who then go to the quieter, more useful members of the community."

They all stared at him.

"Hi. I'm Daryl, I'm a bio-major. All of that 'survival of the fittest' stuff is an outmoded theory that has no basis in fact."

More stares.

Daryl started to feel his heart like a spike in his chest. He swallowed and continued. "In our society, women have less opportunities for work? Um. Andum. When they get it, they get paid less? So it's only natural that she looks for someone who can support her and children she has? Um." Breathe. Deep. Before the spots in his vision made him pass out. "So they're looking for someone who has long-term success? That means, keeping fit, keeping groomed, andum... have- having some... high-quality clothing?"

"Then how do you explain fake geek girls?" challenged his immediate neighbour.

"I haven't found any," he said. "What you think of as 'fake geek girls' are actual girl geeks who just avoid any male who challenges their presence in the same environment. Women don't memorise statistics and facts like men do, they're more about the emotional value they get from an experience. Once they're challenged to recite things beyond their interest spheres, you label them as fake."

"Women still don't belong in science fiction," sneered a weedy beanpole in an eternal hoodie.

"Dude," sighed Daryl. "Women invented science fiction."

"Nuh-uh, Isaac Asimov did it."

"Nuh-uh, Jules Verne."

"Dude, Jules Verne wrote steampunk."

"Lady Margret Cavendish wrote the first science fiction story about a utopian society," said Daryl. He was high. He was flying. He was pissed off. "Way before Jules Verne was born. She published a few months before Mary Shelley published Frankenstein: A Modern Prometheus. Isaac Asimov even credited Mary Shelley for inventing the genre. You," he pointed to a dude wearing a Tardis. "Do you know who produced Doctor Who?"

"Uh. I'unno. Some guy?"

"Verity Lambert. A girl. You," he singled out a guy in a Trek shirt. "Who backed Star Trek in the first place? Who ran the studio where it was shot? Who helped Gene Roddenberry campaign for a second pilot?"

The Star Trek guy shrugged and said, "William Shatner?"

"Lucille Ball," answered Daryl. "A girl. You," he pointed to a guy in a Batman hoodie. "Who invented the very concept of a masked vigilante with a secret identity?"

"Guy Pierce[1]?"

"Baroness Emma Orczy. She wrote the very first masked vigilante with a secret identity in The Scarlet Pimpernel."

"Men still invented books."

"WRONG! The author of the world's first novel was Lady Murasaki. Face it, gentlemen. Women invented everything we love. We should at least pay them a modicum of respect." Daryl sat down before he fell down. "Everything you assume is bullshit. Start again."

The Chair of the meeting cleared his throat, and broke for coffee, Mountain Dew, and the incoming pizza. He also sidled up to Daryl and said, "Yeah, your membership is revoked. Don't come back."

There's no hope for people who won't see any.

[1] One of the many actors who played Zorro. Who was directly inspired by The Scarlet Pimpernel.

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Beloved got paid, yesterday, which means I have money in the bank today. Which means that I can go out and get the life essentials, like almond milk, tub fruit, and ingredients for some adjusted noms.

The recipe originally hails from this tumblr post but I've done some twiddling.

I've replaced the sugar with Stevia, and the peanuts with almonds, and will probably remove as much of the salt as I can get away with by default. Since you can't get salted,

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Challenge #01392-C297: Liminal Time and Space

Night people. Those who by choice, obligation or calling walk or work the Night Shift. -- Knitnan

Children of the night... what interesting lives they have. Those who work from dusk to dawn work in liminal time. Where the strange is not just expected, it is background radiation.

People turning up to their workspace in PJ's, half their PJ's, and minimum legal clothing are a fine example. And though everyone talks about that one time a dude came in wearing a live

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Good news, everyone!

I got the short list back from the lovely people at AR&E, agent-finders at large.

I also got a very nice letter saying I should try all of them at once, just for the ego boost. I'm sorry, Beverly, but all the ego boosting in the world is not worth one atom of being rude.

Agents and writers alike tell you every day that simultaneous submissions, especially lying about it by omission, is beyond nasty. Just. No. The letter says

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Challenge #01391-C296: Strange Customers

Being alive put him at a severe disadvantage -- OohLookShiny

[AN: My instant thought on this is Miles Vorkosigan, but I'm trying to exercise myself here...]

This had to be the strangest motley crew to ever find themselves in Dr Mellitus' offices. One human boy, three automatons. The doctor had been intellectually aware that Junkers cobbled together their own creations from the waste-piles, but this was the first time he'd seen some that looked that way.

Especially the short one. She had

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Broken 'flow'

I get used to doing things a certain way. I get up, wee, weigh myself [89.3kilos. The first time I've been below 90 since age 20!], water the garden, rouse the kids, shower, and get on with keeping everyone in line.

Then I do my blog, Instant Story, and any other writing that I want or have to do.

But when things screw that up, it really screws up.

Yesterday, I assumed that I'd done my Instant. Why? Because yesterday was

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Challenge #01390-C295: O My Mona

A soft smile hiding gritted teeth -- OohLookShiny

He called her Mona, for the smile that echoed the legendary painting. She never talked. Never opened her mouth. Never made a sound. The only communication he ever had from her was her soft and mysterious smile, and the glint in her eyes.

Not that he cared. He took his pleasures from her and left the money with the man who ran the House. But there was just something about Mona.

He came back

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Fun times ahead

I've been trying to transfer my music files into #myphonebygoogle, with varying degrees of success. Our current, dropbox model has hit a snag, in that the phone must be active in order to download.

Google Pixel has a maximum activation period of half an hour. There is no 'never' option and no assumption that a user is clever enough to hook the phone up to a power source whilst that shit is going on.

I mean, come on, google. We were smart

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Challenge #01389-C294: Inevitable Failure

"Hey, I might constantly manipulate people to stack things in my favor, but actually cheating is pushing it a little bit too far," -- OohLookShiny

"It's like this," said the campaign manager. "We gerrymandered, and you're still losing. We've changed the voter ID laws, and you're still losing. We've criminalised a majority of the folks who would never vote for you, and you're still losing. We've sent out false messages about easier ways to vote to the youth demographic and you're still

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I am frustrate

On the continuing saga of New Phone Wat Dis(aka #myphonebygoogle), I have finally combatted the hassle of getting my music data onto my actual phone. The caveat being that the file manager in question will also play random shit that's content for games. We'll work around that when the time comes.

And speaking of workarounds... I did some 3D drafting for Bitzer's new hip handle, this morning. And once done, it should have been an easy matter to transfer those files

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Challenge #01388-C293: Cheerful Charlie

"No worries, Mate! No problem." -- Anon Guest

[AN: Other phrases that Aussies have learned to fear, especially those who remember Joh "I live to fuck up your life" Bjelke-Peterson, are "Don't you worry about that" and "She'll be right" ::twitch::]

If there was a worse curse for a ship's human, T'kethi couldn't think of a worse option than a N'Ozzie Engineer. T'kethi repeatedly set herself reminders to never again pick a human based on pure aesthetics.

They were all ugly, squishy

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I love that Google is cheeky enough to bring out a bigger, brighter, better phone than the iPhone7.

And I have to confess that setting up new apps to supplant the old ones I'm used to is a pain in the arse.

But the biggest pain in the arse is music. Porting ALL my music from iTunes is like unto a labour of Hercules. And it's not just because I own something like five weeks' worth of music.

No, it's because Apple

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Challenge #01387-C292: Ancient Wisdom

Measure twice, cut once, useful advice for anyone. -- Anon Guest

Rael knew he should have checked up on Shayde sooner. She had a knack for teaching new JOATs all the wrong tricks.

Chiefly: "Measure wi' micrometer, mark wi' chalk, cut wi' axe."

So, after hearing this, he simply had to barge in and defend his own honour. "The real adage, Trainee Melkith, is 'measure twice, cut once'. Ambassador Shayde labours under the misapprehension that she is funny."

"I was tellin' 'er

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Google Pixel!

So I'm a long-time Apple nerd, all the way back to the late eighties when I got my first Mac Classic.

But that time is past.

Basically because Apple repeatedly drops the ball by coming out with substandard crap and trying to market it as what the people want. If the people move, en masse, to a better product, then the companies will see what the people really want.

And better yet, I'm getting it for free because Telstra has an upgrade-your-phone

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Challenge #01386-C291: Anti-serendipity

"What happened to the scarf of invulnerability?"

"Uh... my cat ate it." -- OohLookShiny

The cat in question growled from its position under the ottoman. Yellow eyes glowed out from the shadows.

"The good news," said Ki'van, "is that the scarf itself is invulnerable. We... um... just have to wait a bit."

Now the growling from under the ottoman took on a slightly musical quality. So... the cat wasn't just pissed at him.

"I know she'll try to take my arm off

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