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Shitstirring for humanity

Vegans struck me as a little peculiar. Okay. You don't want to eat anything related to animal exploitation? Good for you. Just... please don't try to make me change my ways and we're aces.

Alas, there's a certain section of people (coughcoughivorytowergranolasetcoughcough) that claim that honey is bee slavery.

This just gets a big fat WAT from me because they continue eating fruits and vegetables that use bee labour regardless.

Like... I've tried to do some research on this and... unless you're guaranteed hand-pollinating your crops... This is what you're left with on a freedom-for-bees vegan diet:

  • Navel Oranges
  • Leafy greens
  • Brassicas
  • Root vegetables
  • Legumes
  • Corn and other wind-pollinated vegetables1
  • Herbs
  • Celery
  • Onions and Leeks
  • Mushrooms

And that's it. There's not an ounce of fat anywhere, but loads and loads of carbohydrates. And we all know what a low-fat, high-carb diet does to people - yep. Diabetes and obesity.

And you can't cook it, as far as I'm aware, because all the plant oils available come from plants that need bees.

I guess there might be a fat-burning component in eating all foods raw, but is it enough? Vegans claim so. Long term data has yet to appear because veganism is a new thing.

And aaaaalllll of this came up because Beloved and I started gassing about doing a Ketogenic restaurant. I even have a name for it: Ketogenesis. Serving up everything organic, natural (or as natural as you can get after ahem-mumble-something over 20 000 years of tinkering...) Ketogenic foods with a vegetarian option and one pure vegan salad made out of a little of the low-carb stuff in the list above.

And if the vegans complain, then I have some education for them. If you believe that honey is bee slavery, then you can't eat any fruits and vegetables that bees pollinate. Which means, should you go ketogenic vegan - your options are hellishly limited.

You're welcome to try the ample vegetarian options if you admit that bees are vital symbiotes with humans, and honey is a tasty byproduct that you can choose to use as a sweetener on feast days.

Correction: I just looked some more stuff up and, since peanuts are root legumes, vegans can use peanut oil for cooking. But if you're a ketogenic vegan, you need LOADS of peanut oils in your food.

But you can't have the peanuts because they're loaded with carbs.

It's complicated, I know.

  1. My source did not list them, alas. ↩