I had a bit of a row with Beloved about money again. Domestic arguments always seem to start with income and inlaws. But this time, it included outgoing moneys as well.
I'm a frugal little bean and I try not to have extravagant expenditure. I try to get as much as I can out of as little as possible, and going over that allotment makes me sad, angry, and bitter. Especially when I've done my best scrimping, only to find that Beloved has dropped a minimum of $600 on some new technoscrattle for Chaos.
I don't begrudge Chaos her access to fun for a second. Of course not. What gets to my niblets is this is going to be a cue for me to tighten the metaphorical belt and button down when said belt already has more than a few, over-used notches and I'm already at the chafing point of Squeaky Bum Time.
I'd like, for once, to be able to save up for and buy myself a much-wanted luxury. Or even a thing I sorely need but is beyond my usual realms of expense.
For instance: I really need at least one pair of orthopaedic sandals [$80 for men's properly-made sandals and $90 for women's shoddily-made thongs. Tell me all about how the pink tax doesn't exist. Please do] so I can have arch support minus the sweaty toes. I have to wait until tomorrow for this nonse, because that's when we get paid.
Also happening tomorrow: Bills that need paying, a visit to the doctor's for Chaos, a visit to the hair salon soon after for a fringe trim, and a miniature run-around for hair accessories.
Chaos' hair is getting long, and she's getting concerned about "adult" hairstyles and all that nonse [she's TEN. She doesn't need to grow up that quickly] so we all have to learn about hair styling.
To be quite honest, when I was in High School, I had already passed the Fuckit Factor and just went with one no-fuss style. But then, I also didn't bother to get my hair cut for seven years, so I possibly shouldn't be one to talk.
And teaching Chaos how to do her own hair is something I quail at because I can't firkin remember being taught how to do my own. I don't want Chaos to be helpless on her own, but... eeeehhh...
This is one of my many episodes where my fear of getting it wrong overwhelms my inclination to even try doing the thing. I will have to discuss with Beloved.