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Challenge #01359-C264: Oi Oi Oi

Humans and various aliens discover a new planet at the same time. One one side, the aliens are being blindsided by weather, earthquakes, volcanoes etc. On the other side the humans are having snowball fights, counting lightning strikes, geyser watching and bathing in the geothermal pools.

Details: http://deathcomes4u.tumblr.com/post/149643799993/humans-are-weird -- Anon Guest

The crew of the Curious George had assigned the human to hauling the water cart. So far, the human had advised portable solar shelters in either wearable or carryable form. Hats or 'brollies' to those who preferred the Terran's love of shorthand.

The human was in her Skins and painting her exposed skin with a colourful paste. Some resembled tribal markings, what with the stripes on her nose, cheekbones, and lower lip. Others were just swathes of colour without apparent logic.

"Zinc Oxide," said the human. "Get some on your soft bits. Nobody wants a melanoma."

And since this was a thing that did not come in two syllables or less, the rest of the crew were inclined to believe her. One was bold enough to ask of the colours' significance.

"Nah. Pick anything you like and put it anywhere the sun bites."

It did not take long for the crew to suffer from the heat. Their human hauled them back to the ship and treated them for exposure. And then announced that she was 'nipping off to the beach for a swim."

The water in the ocean was toxic to the crew, with its excess of sodium chloride and an abundance of untested flora and fauna in its depths.

Of course the crew tracked her, monitoring her life signs. The human never showed the slightest hint of distress, and even rode the waves with her body. She came back with an arm full of samples for the lab and an almost deadly amount of sodium chloride in her hair. And therefore spent a goodly amount of hours in decontamination, making certain that every last atom of this hostile world had been purged from her body.

"I dunno what the fuss is about. This place is just like Taranganba, back home."

The scientist on duty logged the entire place as a Deathworld.

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