So... how does Satan feel about this? http://radberto.tumblr.com/post/93236132738/sadyayo-i-always-thought-it-was-funny-as-shit (Couldn't find which of the people I'm subscribed to posted this, so I Googled it - have a random blog!) -- RecklessPrudence
[AN: Take a look at these rules. They're generally along the lines of "respect other people" for the most part. Also, if you actually look at biblical Lucifer in the Old Testament, he's not actually all that evil. Heck I don't think he even did that much in the New Testament, either...]
"Of course I had to go to eleven," argued Lucifer. His head was cradled in Lilith's lap. "That all mighty I-am, upstairs, had to do ten. And even he's lucky if his followers obey two or three."
"And yours don't follow yours at all, do they?"
"They're brainwashed. Brainwashed by Himself and His followers. I know it. People turn to me and they think it's all about killing goats or having sex with children or human sacrifices. They just want an excuse to be evil! It's... appalling what they can come up with."
"Wait... I thought we were supposed to be evil," murmured Lilith.
"Only technically. We disobeyed the orders of I-am and are therefore His enemies. That doesn't mean we're despicable. It just means that we said 'no' and He threw a massive fit."
Lilith laughed. "Yeah. The whole lake of fire thing is totally overreacting. Honestly. You give apes free will and then ask why they choose things... Sometimes I wonder if He knows what He's doing."
"Yeah. Sacrificing His son so there's only one rule? Sure, yay, He's simplified things. Congratulations. Now just how many of those rabid fans, up there, actually follow it?"
"Nobody. I think it was a mistake giving any of them any rules at all. They just know what they're supposed to disobey, now."
"I don't think they even read them."
Lucifer huffed a brief and ironic laugh. "Probably."