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Deathworlders

A 60-post collection

Challenge #04774-M025: Waste Nothing

The human had two massive malamutes that required regular grooming. They washed the loose fur a second time after it was shed, dried it, fluffed it, and stored it. Several species bought the fur for projects, or lining for clothing, or for nesting material. -- Anon Guest

Human Uyn had two massive dogs which, according to hir, were "ninety percent fluff by volume". Whenever ze gave them their "weekly spa treatment", ze wound up with more fluff than dog. Carefully contained in special bags so that they didn't get into the air filters.

What puzzled Companion Zhu was that they were carefully-weighed bags of fifty Standard Weight Units[1]. Most were sorted according to their hue, and labeled with prices.

Once vacuum-packed, they took up surprisingly little space in Uyn's cargo locker. Which made Zhu wonder what possible reason Uyn might have for saving it at all.

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Challenge #04755-M006: Two Dogs Cold

The ship had to land, fortunately it wasn't cheese grater, but there was damage. The place they landed was freezing, locked in the dead of winter. The human protected the ship with an igloo, but what really saved the captain and the two small crew members besides the human? A big, fluffy newfoundland dog, and an equally fluffy, if a bit wriggly, husky. Who, for once, wasn't constantly complaining. -- Anon Guest

[AN: They might be lucky that one of them wasn't

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Challenge #04751-M002: Frozen Battlefield

They take a couple of class 1 and class 2 deathworlder friends to a human hockey game. The galactics are rather shocked at how violence features into what the humans call, a friendly exhibition match. -- The New Guy

[AN: I know bloody well present-day hockey has rules and procedures to prevent or de-escalate aggression. It's almost adorable]

There's entire comedy routines about Deathworlder sports, and how they symbolically boil down to various hunting activities. Kill the ball, kill the person with

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Challenge #04728-L344: Downtime After the Fray

It's been a long slog, the marines were tired, battered, and just tired of it all. They finally got the word, they were going home. One soldier said all he wanted was a nap, and his favorite snacks. Several havenworlder medics, and some level 1 and 2 deathworlder medics, asked the humans, what kind of snacks? -- Anon Guest

"Roasted, salted cashews," said Marine Blem, who had literally rolled out of her battle-rated livesuit and had yet to extract herself from the

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Challenge #04445-L061: Deathworlder Health and Maintenance

"Human, you said water boils at 100 degrees Fahrenheit?"

Yes.

"And your fever is almost 102."

Yes.

"Why are you not boiling in your on flesh?"

It feels like it, but our bodies are stronger than that, and it's what kills viruses the fastest. When it comes to kill or cure? Nothing beats our immune systems. -- Fighting Fit

Companion Kank boggled at the Ships' Human. "What did you do before advanced medical intervention?"

"Aw come on. I'm not in a lot

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Challenge #04441-L057: Do Not the Humans

This group of idiotic deathworlders did not listen when the Alliance warned them not to harass the humans. Why do some people have to learn the hard way? -- Anon Guest

"Listen," said the AI guide. "You're big tough Deathworlders, and wish to prove it. There's other Deathworlders, here, and the temptation is very strong to test how Deathworlder they all are. There's arenas for that."

The tourist group grumbled a little, but seemed to accept the limit on their usual behaviour.

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Challenge #04424-L040: Extremes of Limits

They did not believe humans could survive such extremes of temperatures when no other species could. The humans, for their part, considered it no worse than doing a polar bear plunge, and then jumping into a hot tub afterward. -- Anon Guest

[AN: I've heard of people rolling around in the snow after a sauna, not the other one. I'm sure it's "bracing"]

Seeing things like this, it's easy to believe that they're Deathworlders. The survivors of the volcanic cataclysm were sheltering

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Challenge #04411-L027: Bedtime For the Deathworlder

I can't sleep well no matter what I do. Even medicine doesn't help half the time. Can you please help me think of a way to get some rest? -- Anon Guest

Companion Throk could clearly see the shadows under Human Zyr's eyes. She could detect the slump in Zyr's shoulders and the slowness of their movements. She was worried. "Human Zyr... are you suffering another sickness?"

"No, I just had a rough night. I'm having trouble getting settled down, and when

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Challenge #04403-L019: Organic Pest Control

What do you do when your ship is dealing with a bug infestation, and these pests are adapting to your most technological solutions? You call in a human pest control service! -- Anon Guest

If there is anything the Galactic Alliance knew before they knew anything true about Humans, it was that if you wanted something destroyed - they came very much in handy. Just make certain that they understand the assignment.

And don't ask too many questions about where the destroyed

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Challenge #04402-L018: Zero Ammunition Combat Ready

Why do you have so many primitive weapons? Our stunners and plasma rifles are far more efficient.

"True enough, but your stunners and rifles can break down in the wrong kind of environment. With these spears, and things like this bow, all you need is physics, and knowing which direction the sharp end is going." -- Fighting Fit

Everyone knew that the Humans were a little bit strange. If you asked the right ones, they'd confess proudly to being a lottle bit

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Challenge #04401-L017: A Thousand Points of Light

It's again the anniversary of when the Earth circles their star. Even though they are far from Earth, and have never actually been there, they were born and raised on a different world, like the people of Earth, they celebrate with parties, lots of food, and lots of brightly colored drones making the equivalent of silent fireworks in the air. Don't want to scare friends with the bangs after all! -- Anon Guest

[AN: Most Terran colonies celebrate their own solar anniversary,

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Challenge #04389-L005: 'Tis But a Scratch!

Human, why is there a long, red, gash across your hand??

"Oh, that's just a scratch don't worry, already treated it."

But it looks enflamed!

"Yah, we humans do that when we get small cuts like this, it's sterilized, and treated, but it'll look bad for an hour or so, then heal right up." -- Anon Guest

"Are you certain? An injury like that should be inspected by medical. Just to be sure it won't get worse." Companion Gine bobbed in concern,

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Challenge #04384-K366: Poison in Acid? Refreshing!

Human, that fluid is caustic enough to strip paint from metal! And you're drinking it?? How are you not dead yet??

"It tastes good, it's fizzy, and it helps me stay awake. Besides, its just a soda." -- Anon Guest

Companion Laus could barely contain hir anxiety. "But.. the gasses will cause intense digestive pain. Colic is a fatal--"

Human Tam belched, causing Companion Laus to boggle at him. "You can just do that?"

"Yeah, we can reject stuff that's bad for

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Challenge #04380-K362: Not a Nice Kitty

They think the creature is just another earth cat. They should have listened to the warnings about the black creatures with the white stripes down their backs. The invaders need a lot of care and decontamination! -- Anon Guest

"Uh, Byox? Don't pet that one!"

"It's a harmless cat. Look, it has it's tail up, and what a floof!"

"No don't--" too late. Human Dez winced in pure sympathy as Byox got the full treatment from a neighbourhood skunk. "Ooohhhh... Ouch."

Byox

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Challenge #04372-K354: Only Looks Harmless

The humans mocked another human calling them a hippo.

The human, much to the shock of their Alliance friends, thanked the mockers.

The mockers were shocked and swore at the human.

The human said "You just compared me to one of THE most feared animals on the planet next to the humble mosquito. An animal that is fast, powerful, literally a living, amphibious, tank. So thanks!" -- Fighting Fit

Of all the things that could happen in the Edge Territories, this was

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