Snappy Comebacks

A 2-post collection

Converting the masses

Everyone who's figured out that modern medicine is trying to kill us for profit has had zero problems whatsoever flipping to Ketogenics, and flipping their nearest medic the bird. It's the people who believe in doctors like they believe in The Powers That Be1, who are all over the others with objections of their own.

  • "But my doctor says..."
  • "You need carbs (for brain function/to live)."
  • "That can't be good for your cholesterol..."
  • "But [CARB-LOADED THING] is healthy."
  • "But I can still have a little [CARB THING] now and then?"
  • "They did thousands of tests, they can't be wrong."
  • "My diet's okay."

And the latest from MeMum: "I can't do that because I'm genetically prone to high cholesterol."


Doctors have been changing their mind about causes of cholesterol since the Lipid Theory emerged blinking into the global stage. Butter causes cholesterol, Margerine causes cholesterol, Trans fats [aka hydrogenated vegetable oils] cause cholesterol... it just goes on and on.

None of them have looked at why our species' health went downwards the instant we had starchy crops.

That is, until now. The Paleo Diet, and others like it, hit the world stage and trumpeted the advantages of whole foods, proteins, and hardly any carbs. People on such diets lost weight, felt happier, and had less problems than the believers in carbs.

And some doctors started taking notice. The smart fellow from Switzerland that I mentioned in previous blogs started the site I linked to above and let people access all the recipes for free.

It's a revolution, and like all revolutions, there is heavy resistance from the old power.

So... I have some counter-arguments for anyone trying to help others out of their carb-loaded path to an earlier grave.

1) My doctor says...

  • Your doctor is working off the old-fashioned Lipid Theory.
  • Have you tried talking to them about the Ketogenic Diet?
  • Do they know about the Ketogenic Diet?

2) "You need carbs (for brain function/to live)."

  • No, we don't.
  • Science has proven that the brain runs on essential fatty acids and not carbs.
  • The body can get all the energy it needs from essential fats and vegetables.

3) "That can't be good for your cholesterol."

  • Actually it's great for my cholesterol.
  • Science changes its mind about what cholesterol does every five minutes, check out this site and make sure you're up to date.
  • Here, I have this video about how carbs fuck up your cholesterol that you can watch.

4) "But [CARB THING] is healthy."

  • I know that some people say that, but it's less healthy than you think.
  • Radioactivity used to be healthy, too, but we saw the error of our ways.
  • Ever wondered why keeping your weight down is such a struggle? That's one of the culprits.

5) "I can still have a little [CARB THING] once in a while?"

  • Only if you want to fuck up your body.
  • Just try this diet for two weeks and see if you still feel any need for it.
  • No, it's bad for you.


  • Yes, my diet is balanced. I have all my essential fatty acids, nutrients, and vitamins.
  • Carbs throw everything out of balance.
  • (Put your meat on one side and the veg on the other and show them you can balance your plate.) See? Balanced.

7) "They did tests, they can't be wrong."

  • They did nuclear tests, too, and we know those were wrong.
  • And they found that there's no real link between blood cholesterol and mortality.
  • They also tested other theories, including Ketogenesis, it's just that cholesterol got all the limelight.

8) "My diet's okay."

  • Is it?
  • I'm sure you think so.
  • Are you happy on it? (Because they're most likely unhappy)

Adapt your own. You're welcome.

  1. Insert religion of choice here.