The bookkeeper of a new evil organisation to their superior:
I'm sorry but no, a "giant robot of doom with lasers that go pew pew" is not feasible. Because not only it sounds silly, but we lack the funding. And no, I won't allow any medium or high destruction plan as long as you didn't find a way to increase our income. If you want to blow things up, I'll only allow dynamite. And we can't pay more than 5 minions at a time. And I warn you, if you do any excessive spent without my approval, it's steamed potato for a month. -- Anon Guest
Migno the Malevolent pouted on his throne-like chair. "I am trying," he said, "to be the ultimate evil, here. The worst living thing on this earth. I need a volcano secret base, some kind of intimidating laser-assisted animal life, and at least one overly-complicated death trap. Because when a nicely-dressed superspy gets up in my grille, I actually have to be prepared for that."
The accountant took all this down. "And... why are you doing this?"
"To take over the world, of course. Once the global system is under a unified rule, things will be way more efficient. No more starving people in weird little countries. It'll all be one country. No borders to secure - no borders at all! Universal medicine, guaranteed food supplies, no more trade tarriffs. A sudden lack of tax shelters... the whole nine yards."